It's Too Late For Me

Developer: "I hate PHP! Get that thing out of my face!" *Discovers Laravel framework* *Aggressively chomps Laravel* *Suddenly sees dollar signs floating around* It's the classic developer journey from "PHP is trash" to "actually I can make money with this" pipeline. The framework makes the language palatable enough to swallow your pride along with it. The bird isn't evolving its opinions—just its billing rate.

Every programmer knows that dark journey. You start innocently searching for "how to center a div" and three hours later you're watching a tutorial on creating realistic fur shaders in WebGL by some guy who sounds like he hasn't slept in four days. The search for animation references is just the beginning of the rabbit hole that leads you to the disturbing underbelly of programming tutorials where people implement sorting algorithms with interpretive dance and explain pointer arithmetic while dressed as anime characters. The YouTube algorithm knows your weakness—it's not cat videos, it's "uncomfortably enthusiastic dev explaining RegEx at 3am."

The secret sauce of modern development revealed! When asked about becoming a coder, the honest answer isn't four years of computer science or mastering algorithms—it's just endlessly Googling error messages until something magically works. The uncomfortable truth is that 90% of our "expertise" is knowing exactly what to search for and which Stack Overflow answer to copy-paste. ChatGPT is just Google with extra steps and fewer captchas asking us to identify traffic lights.

Frontend developers discovering that 90% of CSS layout problems can be solved with one tool. Need to center a div? Flexbox. Align text vertically? Flexbox. Footer stuck in the middle of nowhere? Flexbox. Building a complex data table? You guessed it... also Flexbox. It's like that one friend who brings WD-40 to fix everything from squeaky doors to relationship problems. Before Flexbox, we were arranging pixels with dark magic and sacrificing RAM to the CSS gods. Now we just flex-direction our problems away.

THE AUDACITY! W3Schools pretending to teach us C# with an .php file extension in the URL, then switching to PHP with an .asp extension?! The ULTIMATE BETRAYAL of web development! It's like ordering a pizza and getting a sandwich wrapped in pizza box. The irony is so thick you could compile it into an executable and it would STILL throw errors. Whoever spotted this deserves a medal for exposing the web development equivalent of wearing socks with sandals. PURE CHAOS!

The structural integrity of this web app is questionable at best! Building a complex application with just HTML is like constructing this wonky mint-green building with only concrete and prayers. No CSS to style it properly, no JavaScript for functionality—just raw markup holding everything together by sheer force of will. The building even has that "I forgot to close a div tag somewhere" energy with that oddly slanted roof. 10/10 would not pass a code review OR a building inspection.