html Memes

The ultimate hipster programmer manifesto has arrived! At the top, we have the "Reject modernity" squad featuring React, Tailwind, Vue, some hipster hamster, and TypeScript—basically everything recruiters won't stop messaging you about on LinkedIn. Meanwhile, the "Embrace tradition" crew is just chilling below with HTML, CSS, JavaScript, PHP, and Python—you know, the technologies that actually keep the internet from imploding. It's like choosing between a complicated pour-over coffee ritual versus just drinking the office coffee that somehow still works. Sure, the modern frameworks look impressive on your resume, but when the apocalypse comes, who do you think will still be able to make a website work? The person who can write vanilla JS or the one who needs 37 dependencies just to center a div?

Oh sweet merciful bytes! The blue wizard speaks the FORBIDDEN WORDS that have torn apart friendships and destroyed entire Stack Overflow threads! "HTML is a programming language" - the most SCANDALOUS statement in web development history! And just like that, our poor developer is TRAPPED in the most ancient holy war of the internet. Left? Right? There's NO ESCAPE from this syntactic purgatory! The sword of lies has claimed another victim!

The eternal holy war of code formatting: spaces vs tabs vs... chaos . The first two types meticulously indent their HTML with either spaces or tabs, maintaining some semblance of sanity and structure. But that third type? They just slam everything into a single line with no breaks whatsoever, like some kind of code-writing sociopath. This is the person who submits PRs at 4:59 PM on Friday and then immediately logs off. The same monster who responds to bug reports with "works on my machine" and uses Comic Sans in their IDE. They're not coding—they're committing crimes against humanity.

Ah, the classic tech industry paradox! Job listings demanding a decade of experience from people who've barely had time to learn how to tie their shoes. This baby's got the right idea—start cramming HTML before you can even form complete sentences. Next up on the reading list: "React for Toddlers" and "Kubernetes Before Kindergarten." The tech hiring market is so absurd that we're basically expecting fetuses to have contributed to open source projects. Should've started coding in the womb if you wanted that entry-level position!