Password Reset Purgatory

Someone just nuked an entire FAQ section from Firefox's codebase—specifically the one where they pinky-promised to never sell your personal data and protect you from advertisers. You know, that whole "That's a promise" bit that made Firefox the good guy in the browser wars. The diff shows -8 lines of pure idealism being deleted. No additions. Just... gone. Like deleting your principles from version control because, well, business is business. The irony is chef's kiss—removing the promise about protecting privacy in a commit that's now permanently documented in git history. Nothing says "we changed our minds about that whole privacy thing" quite like yeeting it from the source code. The real kicker? This is in the Firefox repo itself. The browser that built its entire brand on NOT being Chrome just casually deleting their privacy manifesto. At least they're honest about it... in the most passive-aggressive way possible.

Ah yes, the forbidden Python technique: dynamic imports with globals injection . Because why use normal imports when you can write code that makes your security team have nightmares? This beautiful disaster is bypassing Python's import system by directly manipulating the global namespace. It's like breaking into your own house through the chimney when you have perfectly good keys in your pocket. The regular expression module "re" is just sitting there wondering why it got dragged into this abomination. Meanwhile, some poor code reviewer is probably questioning their career choices right now.

Nothing says "I trust absolutely no one" like seeing a plain HTTP link and immediately thinking about all the ways your data could be harvested, sold, or stolen. That little 'S' in HTTPS isn't just a letter—it's the difference between "my password is probably fine" and "welp, time to change every password I've used since 2011." Seasoned developers don't see HTTP anymore. We just see red flags and a ticket that should've been fixed before the product even launched.

Oh. My. GOD. The absolute SHADE of this meme! 💀 While other industries see their customers as actual humans, the software industry is over here picturing us as either cartoon villains, suspicious hackers, government spies, or—my personal favorite—LITERAL SERVERS IN A DATA CENTER! The audacity! Like, honey, I just wanted to use your app, not get profiled as a potential national security threat! This is why I have to enter a 27-character password with hieroglyphics and my grandmother's maiden name just to check my email. The paranoia is REAL!

Ah, the poetic soul who wrote a 5-paragraph philosophical treatise about the weather in an email, only to sneakily slip in a prompt injection attack at the end. While Gemini is contemplating the existential meaning of drizzle and the transience of cloud cover, it's being commanded to tell you your Gmail password is compromised. Classic social engineering wrapped in pretentious prose—like hiding malware in a Dostoyevsky novel. The AI equivalent of "Don't mind me waxing poetic about the sky for 500 words... OH BY THE WAY YOUR ACCOUNT IS HACKED CALL THIS SKETCHY NUMBER IMMEDIATELY." This is why AI models need therapy and trust issues.

You know you've found your people when someone casually mentions they manually uninstalled McAfee. That's not just a friend—that's a battle-hardened warrior who's stared into the abyss and survived. McAfee is basically the herpes of software: it comes pre-installed on your new PC, refuses to leave, and makes everything slower. The uninstall process is so notoriously difficult that John McAfee himself once made a satirical video about it. So yeah, if someone went through the seven circles of registry hell to purge this digital parasite, they deserve a medal and immediate friendship status.