Code Speaks For Itself

Content Recruiter: Do you have a CS background? Me: Yes, absolutely My CS background:

Content Debugging Ide-dung-ing - verb I Being The Detective I A hime Movie Where You ANd Also The Murderer.

Content My boss, changing my entire code, during code review Me, who thougl my code was RI good to commit

Ah, the classic cryptography trio! In security modeling, Alice and Bob are the standard characters who want to communicate securely, while Mallory is the malicious attacker intercepting their messages. But here, poor Mallory has been replaced by The Atlantic magazine—implying they're now the ones snooping on everyone's conversations and spreading them to the world. Journalists: the new man-in-the-middle attack! Ten years in cybersecurity and I still can't decide which is more dangerous.

OH. MY. GOD. The absolute DRAMA of asking a simple coding question online! 💀 Left side: innocent newbie with puppy eyes asking for help in Python. Right side: the AUDACITY of these keyboard warriors telling you to "read the docs" like they were born understanding recursion! But PLOT TWIST! Bottom panel shows the rare unicorn who actually helps AND explains, getting a simple "thanks" while the rage-faces continue their existential meltdown about how you're "not a real programmer." The true heroes of StackOverflow are outnumbered by documentation-worshipping gatekeepers who'd rather die than explain a simple for-loop to a beginner. Heaven forbid someone asks how to center a div!

Front-end development: peaceful meadows, sunshine, and playing with cute dinosaurs. Meanwhile, back-end developers are literally fighting for their lives in a post-apocalyptic hellscape where everything is on fire and mutant babies are trying to eat your face. But hey, the crushing existential dread comes with a higher salary, so there's that! The perfect visualization of why back-end devs always look like they've seen things no human should witness. "It's fine, everything's fine" they whisper, as another server crashes at 3am.