Functions Memes

Posts tagged with Functions

The Critical Exception In Your Daily Runtime

The Critical Exception In Your Daily Runtime
Ah yes, the classic developer life cycle reduced to its most essential functions. Someone proudly displayed their minimalist existence as while(alive) { eat(); sleep(); code(); } only to have another dev point out the critical exception handling they've missed. Without poop() , you're headed straight for a PoopOverflow exception - the most unpleasant stack overflow you'll ever experience. No garbage collection system in the world can save you from that one.

Try Eat Catch Poop Overflow

Try Eat Catch Poop Overflow
THE AUDACITY of this developer thinking they can survive without a proper waste management function! 💩 Some innocent soul created a cute life algorithm banner with just eat() , sleep() , and code() in an infinite loop, and then BOOM! Someone had to point out the CRITICAL FLAW in their system architecture! Without poop() , that memory buffer is going to fill up FAST, honey! And we all know what happens next... catastrophic system failure! Your body's heap memory isn't infinite, sweetie! 💅 It's basically the most relatable garbage collection failure in human history. Eat without pooping? In THIS economy?!

Why Isn't My Function Running?

Why Isn't My Function Running?
The eternal programming conversation that happens in every developer's head at 2 AM: Spent three hours writing a function? Check. Tested it thoroughly? Not even once. Then comes the inevitable moment of confusion when nothing works, followed by the crushing realization that you never actually called the function. It's like building an entire swimming pool and forgetting to fill it with water. The function is just sitting there, perfectly written, completely useless, silently judging your life choices.

Def Not Answering

Def Not Answering
When you desperately call a Python function but it just sits there ignoring you like that smug cat. The meme brilliantly plays on the keyword "def" in Python, which defines functions but also sounds like "deaf" - meaning the function isn't listening to your calls. Every Python dev has experienced that moment when your function refuses to execute despite your increasingly frantic invocations. The cat's unbothered expression perfectly captures that cold, silent treatment your code gives you right before you discover you forgot to actually call the function with parentheses.

The Debug Error Be Like

The Debug Error Be Like
Spent four hours debugging why your function returns undefined only to realize you never actually called it? Classic. This is the programming equivalent of yelling at your TV remote before noticing it has no batteries. The transformation from rage monster to sheepish realization is the universal developer journey. Ten years in the industry and I still do this at least once a sprint.

Pass The Salt... But How?

Pass The Salt... But How?
Dinner conversation takes a nerdy turn when someone asks for salt and the programmer at the table immediately needs to know the parameter passing method. Just another day of being unable to turn off the code brain. The rest of the family has learned to specify their variable scoping before requesting condiments.

Async Is Contagious

Async Is Contagious
Start with a normal function handshake, end with the ENTIRE CODEBASE being infected with async/await! 😱 The moment you introduce ONE async function into your pristine synchronous paradise, it spreads faster than gossip in a developer Slack channel! Suddenly EVERYTHING needs to be async, your functions are covered in purple Teletubby suits, and your once-simple code is now a hellscape of Promises and .then() chains! The async plague has no cure - resistance is futile! Your beautiful sequential code? MURDERED in cold blood by the async mafia!

The Missing Function Call Revelation

The Missing Function Call Revelation
Staring at your screen for 45 minutes, questioning your entire career choice because your function isn't returning anything... only to realize you never actually called it. Just another Tuesday in the life of a developer. The difference between rage and shame is just one missing parenthesis pair () .

How's Learning Game Dev Going

How's Learning Game Dev Going
Game development expectation: Write elegant functions, see beautiful graphics. Game development reality: Scream in terror as your console spits out "Thing 1 happened" with zero context about what crashed your entire project at 3AM. The top panel shows the dream - neatly organized functions ready to execute. The bottom panel reveals the nightmare - Godot Engine running on a high-end RTX 4060 GPU, yet still only managing to tell you "Thing 1 happened" before your character clips through the floor and into the void for the 47th time today.

Random() Functions Is Not Random

Random() Functions Is Not Random
Oh. My. GOD. The absolute AUDACITY of programming languages to call these functions "random" when they're about as random as my aunt Gertrude's weekly bingo schedule! 🙄 These so-called "random" functions are LITERALLY just deterministic algorithms in disguise, honey! Feed them the same seed, and they'll spit out the exact same sequence EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. The BETRAYAL! It's like ordering a "surprise" meal but getting the same chicken sandwich for the 57th time. JUST CALL THEM WHAT THEY ARE - pseudorandom! The Matrix kid knows what's up!

My Colleague Doesn't Like His Own Spaghetti Functions

My Colleague Doesn't Like His Own Spaghetti Functions
Someone's had enough of the 3000-line function that calculates tax, sends emails, updates databases, and makes coffee all in one go. Nothing says "I've reached my breaking point" like passive-aggressive office notes taped to the wall. Single responsibility principle isn't just good practice—it's apparently grounds for workplace violence if ignored. The colleague who wrote this has definitely muttered "what the hell does this even do?" while scrolling through functions named 'processData' at 2 AM.

The Anon Design Pattern

The Anon Design Pattern
The meme shows John Carmack (legendary DOOM creator) wearing an Oculus VR headset with a valve on his glasses, while someone mocks his C programming style. What they don't realize is that Carmack's procedural "functions only" approach created one of the most influential games ever while modern devs are still arguing about design patterns and class hierarchies. Sure, laugh at the lack of OOP while he's over there revolutionizing an entire industry with "just functions." Classic case of a junior dev criticizing senior code they don't understand yet.