engineering Memes

I Ask Myself Every Day What Went Wrong

I Ask Myself Every Day What Went Wrong
The eternal struggle of math majors who chose programming instead of the "traditional" math paths. On the left, we see the bright, colorful world of physics, machine learning, electrical engineering, statistics, and numerical analysis – all respectable career choices that utilize advanced mathematics. On the right, the noir film-style programmer, stripped of color and joy, questioning their life choices while debugging someone else's spaghetti code at 3 AM. That moment when you realize you could be solving differential equations but instead you're arguing with the compiler about why a semicolon is missing. The math degree prepared you to understand complex algorithms but forgot to mention you'd spend 90% of your time fixing indentation errors.

Must Be A DDoS Attack

Must Be A DDoS Attack
Ah, the classic tech executive playbook: First, fire a third of your engineering team. Then, host a high-profile interview that everyone will want to watch. Finally, act surprised when your remaining skeleton crew can't handle the traffic spike. It's like removing three wheels from your car and then wondering why it can't complete a cross-country road trip. The distributed denial of service isn't from hackers—it's from your own distributed denial of common sense.

Where Is The Documentation

Where Is The Documentation
The eternal corporate blame game in its natural habitat. Nobody actually knows how the feature works because the documentation disappeared into the same void where missing socks and project timelines go. QA points to Product, Product points to Engineering, and Engineering points right back because that's how we roll in software development. Meanwhile, the customer is sitting there wondering why they pay for this circus. The real documentation was the friends we made along the way.

Over Promise Under Deliver

Over Promise Under Deliver
The eternal tech company standoff: Engineer holding their head in despair because they know the laws of physics, time, and sanity won't allow that feature to be built in a week... while the Project Manager has already sent out the company-wide email with champagne emojis announcing the launch date. That awkward moment when your PM has promised the impossible to stakeholders while you're still figuring out if the feature is even technically feasible. Nothing says "team dynamics" like one person having a migraine about reality while the other is planning the celebration party.

Refactoring This Should Be A Breeze...

Refactoring This Should Be A Breeze...
Ever seen a codebase that looks like it was designed by drunk toddlers playing Jenga? That's what happens when someone utters those fateful words: "Just keep coding. We can always fix it later." This brick wall is basically every legacy project I've inherited. Sure, it technically "works" in the same way this wall technically exists — but one strong breeze (or one edge case) and the whole thing collapses faster than my will to live during a 3 AM production hotfix. And that promised refactoring? It's like saying "I'll start my diet tomorrow" — we all know it's never happening. By the time you circle back, you'll need a team of archaeologists to understand what that spaghetti mess was supposed to do in the first place.

Just Got Accepted Into Mc Faang

justGotAcceptedIntoMcFAANG | engineer-memes, engineering-memes, debugging-memes, bug-memes, machine-memes, data-memes, sql-memes, database-memes, list-memes, algorithm-memes, debug-memes, algorithms-memes, cli-memes, mac-memes, pip-memes, nosql-memes, pipeline-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io
Content After thousands of applications, I just accepted an offer from a McFAANG company! Shitpost Don't want to specify which one, but I'm super excited to finally be working at a top tier McFAANG company! I will be in a Forward Deployed Food Engineering Specialist role! Some of my job responsibilities include: Building ETL pipelines to extract frozen patties from the FREEZER database and transforming them into ready made burgers Deriving insights and analysis on client orders from the cash register Managing real-time NoSQL (No Salt Queue Layer) deployments for french fry processing Maintaining high-throughput IO operations at drive-through queuing interface while ensuring sub-60-second response times Implementing mission-critical data cleaning protocols using proprietary mop-based algorithms Debugging ice cream machines I'm extremely excited to receive a base TC of over 280k (per decade) for my first job out of college! If anyone wants some tips or tricks, feel free to ask

What Is Adomain Specific Language

whatIsADomainSpecificLanguage | engineer-memes, engineering-memes, version-memes, language-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io
Content thelancecarison o 53m I'm having a tough time describing what a DSL (domain specific language) is to a friend that is learning about these things. I have my version and definition but I think my definition might be too complicated and don't want them to feel discouraged! Chat, can we come up with really good metaphors and reasons why we use DSLs to help explain how to use them and their purpose? Q12 C) hi.im.vijay o 6 36m a domain-specific language is what happens when you give a staff engineer too much time to work on an engineering problem 31 Q1 (22

Ai Job Security

aiJobSecurity | software-memes, engineer-memes, software engineer-memes, engineering-memes, security-memes, cs-memes, manager-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io
Content Bryan Follow bryancsk You think they're going to replace software engineers with Al? Hahaha. Engineering managers are promoted based on how much headcount they are managing. You think they'd cut their own numbers?

Remove Word From Dataset

removeWordFromDataset | engineer-memes, engineering-memes, google-memes, data-memes, reddit-memes, train-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io
Content REDDIT SELLING CONTENT TO GOOGLE FOR AI TRAINING REDDITORS SPAMMING "BAZINGAP PEOPLE WHO KNOW HOW DATA ENGINEERING AND AI TRAINING WORKS.

Validation Looking Kinda Thicc Tho

validationLookingKindaThiccTho | code-memes, engineer-memes, engineering-memes, bug-memes, security-memes, devs-memes, function-memes, validation-memes, oop-memes, authentication-memes, recursive-memes, IT-memes, ide-memes, bot-memes, documentation-memes, comment-memes, graph-memes, graphql-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io
Content My team's intern just found a critical bug by shitposting in our codebase So our summer intern (who I'm 90 sure is a professional shitposter moonlighting as a dev) just saved our entire authentication service by being, well, an absolute agent of chaos. Background: We have this legacy auth system that's been running since before TikTok existed. No one touches it. It's documented in ancient Sanskrit and COBOL comments. The last guy who understood it fully left to become a yoga instructor in Peru. Enter our intern. First week, he asks why our commit messages are so boring. Starts adding memes to his. Whatever, right? Then he begins leaving comments in the codebase like: This function is older than me and probably pays taxes TODO: Ask if this while loop has health insurance Here lies Sarah's hopes and dreams (2019-2022), killed by this recursive call The senior devs were split between horrified and amused. But here's where it gets good. He's reading through the auth code (because "the commit messages here are too normal, sus") and adds this gem: yo why this token validation looking kinda thicc though fr fr no cap this base64 decode bussin wait... hold up... this ain't bussin at all Turns out his Gen Z spider-sense wasn't just tingling for the memes. Man actually found a validation bypass that's been lurking in our code since Obama's first term. The kind of bug that makes security auditors wake up in cold sweats. The best part? His Jira ticket title: "Auth be acting mad sus rn no cap frfr (Critical Security Issue)" The worst part? We now have to explain to the CEO why "no cap frfr" appears in our Q3 security audit report. The absolute kicker? Our senior security engineer's official code review comment: "bestie... you snapped with this find ng" I can't tell if this is the peak or rock bottom of our engineering culture. But I do know our intern's getting a return offer, if only because I need to see what he'll do to our GraphQL documentation.

Agile And Scrum In Anutshell

agileAndScrumInANutshell | software-memes, code-memes, engineer-memes, engineering-memes, loc-memes, shell-memes, session-memes, search-memes, IT-memes, ide-memes, comment-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io
Content rSoftwareEngineering 4 yr. ago destructorrph Is it just me or does Agile seem to waste a lot of time? We follow an "Agile" process. We have lots of meetings and with meetings, no matter how short, come with lots of time wasted having to ramp down and then ramp back up with projects. We usually have a meeting every single morning at 940, so it's rare any work of significance gets done before that. Then we usually have an hour long sprint meeting and an hour long grooming session each week. Seems like there is a lot of wasted time associated with Agile. 10 J 16 1, Share Add a comment Sort by: Best V O Search Comments PottyMouthPikachu 4y ago Agile is shit. instead of having an expert who knows a process inside and out and will be able to guessknow the point of failure, a problem gets assigned to the first monkey available and they have to search the entire codebase to locate it JIRA is trash. Agile is trash. Fight me. 4 S Reply Award Share Funduval 2y ago It makes me want to gnaw off my own arm, 4 1 3 W Reply Award 1 Share

Software Engineering Career

softwareEngineeringCareer | software-memes, engineer-memes, engineering-memes, reddit-memes, interview-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io
Content The Interview The Job Posted in rsquidgame by uNo-Eye-9491 reddit