Oracle Being Oracle

Nothing says "I trust my users completely" like letting them run raw SQL queries directly against your production database. This code is basically saying "Here's the keys to my database kingdom, please don't DELETE FROM users WHERE 1=1." It's the digital equivalent of leaving your front door wide open with a sign that says "Please don't steal anything." Security teams everywhere just felt a disturbance in the force, as if millions of injection vulnerabilities suddenly cried out in terror.

Content Dashboards Projects Issues Boards v Create Q Jira Server and Data Center JRASERVER-65811 Change the string "allopenissues" to not include the word "penis" Q Comment Details Type: Agile Board More v A Suggestion Status: Resolution: Components: Labels: Current Status: None None v Fixed in Versions: CLOSED (View Workflow) Unsolved Mysteries None Atlassian Update - 24-01-2019 Sigmund Freud: Sometimes a Cigar is Just a Cigar. Regards, Jira Server Team

Someone asks how to solve the infamous N+1 query problem in ORMs, and the response is pure gold: just double it and pass it to the next person. Because why fix a performance nightmare when you can make it exponentially worse and let it become someone else's problem? For context: The N+1 query problem happens when your ORM fetches a list of N items, then makes a separate database query for each item's related data. So instead of 1 query, you get N+1 queries. It's like ordering pizza one slice at a time instead of just ordering the whole damn pie. The solution here? Make it 2N+2 queries and yeet it to your colleague. Peak engineering right there. This is the database equivalent of setting your code on fire and walking away in slow motion.

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Content SQL programmers be like NathanTheCreator Caps Lock

Content If you hold a UNIX shell to your ear, can you hear the C?