The Corporate Website's Dirty Little Secret

This developer just casually created an "app skeleton" with 3,163 files changed and +637,124 lines of code in a SINGLE commit. That's not a skeleton—that's an entire digital cemetery! When most of us create a "skeleton app," we mean a few files and basic structure. This person apparently thinks "skeleton" means "fully formed creature with organs, skin, and probably its own consciousness." The PR is even marked "Ready to merge" with no reviews requested. Bold strategy—let's see if anyone survives the code review!

Three hours of debugging only to discover the cache was laughing at you the whole time. That moment when you're ready to either put your head through the monitor or use that gun on your codebase. The worst part? You've made this exact mistake six times before and swore it would never happen again. Hard to look smart when your career is being derailed by a browser refresh button.

OH. MY. GOD. The AUDACITY of this burn! 🔥 Full-stack developers are basically the theater kids of programming who proudly announce they can do EVERYTHING while secretly being mediocre at EVERYTHING. It's like claiming you're bilingual because you can say "hello" and "bathroom" in seven languages. The jack of all trades, master of absolutely none! That resume might say "full-stack" but what it really means is "I've watched tutorials for both React AND MongoDB." Diversifying your incompetence isn't a skill, honey!

The classic "let me know if you need anything else" client interaction has reached its final form. Some non-technical person casually asking you to "write my entire app" while they nap is the modern equivalent of "can you fix my printer while you're here?" Except now they want you to build the next Facebook during their power nap. The sinister wojak response is every developer's inner monologue when clients have absolutely no concept of time, effort, or reality. We smile politely while internally plotting to make their app harvest data and addict users... because that's totally how programming works, right?

The universal startup formula: someone with zero technical knowledge but a "revolutionary idea" chasing down the nearest programmer they can find. "I'll handle the business side" translates to "I'll take 90% equity while you build the entire product." The programmer's running away is the most technically accurate part of the whole scenario. Just another day where someone thinks their Uber-but-for-dog-walkers concept is worth billions while the implementation is apparently just "some coding stuff."

OH. MY. GOD. The AUDACITY of this person claiming they "use C++ in JavaScript" only to reveal they're just using the increment operator (c++) in a basic for loop! 💀 This is like saying you're fluent in Italian because you can order a pizza! The absolute BETRAYAL when they show their "C++" code and it's just a pathetic little counter printing numbers with line breaks. And everyone's losing their minds laughing because it's the programming equivalent of saying you're a chef because you can make toast. THE DRAMA! THE DECEPTION!