Enterprise Apps: Where Simple Tasks Go To Die

Content How Programmers are portrayed in movies: white male conspicuously nerdy everything he codes works on the first try fast typist, types extra fast in programming emergencies never Googles error messages, in fact there are no error messages

Content TOP DEFINITION C y f 3 A programming language for Real Men. Most languages try to provide a simplified way to solve specific problems well. C makes no such concession and tries to be mediocre at everything. It lets you program at a very high level, and a very low level in the same program. It lets you write procedural code, object oriented code, generic code and mix them all up. It makes you decide everything and provides no help if you get it wrong. It is by far the biggest, most complicated, ugly, down-right dangerous language you can use. But it does run fast. It takes at least twice as long to program in C as any other major language (except C). The men who program in C are Real Men. The women who program in C are Real Men too. You can spot a C programmer from their testosterone fueled swagger, and the unbelievable amount of contempt they inject into the phrase Java "programmer". They'll probably do the air quotes and all. Dev: 'Hey, Reg, you know C right? What does: "Isrc Cont.spp(52) : error C2679: binary '': no operator found which takes a right- hand operand of type 'int' (or there is no acceptable conversion) C: Program Files Microsoft Visual Studio 8VC include vector (392): could be 'std: VectoriteratorTy, Alloc std:VectoriteratorTy, Alloc:operator (const std:VectoriteratorTy, Alloc' with TyMain::Cont, Allocstd allocatorMain::Cont while trying to match the argument list '(std::VectoriteratorTy, Alloc, int)' with TyMain::Cont, Allocstd :allocatorMain::Cont " mean?' Reg: 'You missed a semicolon at the end of the line'

Who needs test-driven development when you can have bug-driven testing? The top panel shows the proper way to catch bugs—writing tests to find problems in your code. But let's be real... the bottom panel captures what actually happens in the trenches. You write some janky code, it breaks spectacularly in production, and suddenly you're frantically writing tests to figure out what the hell went wrong. It's the classic "I'll write tests later" approach that somehow becomes "I'll write tests when everything catches fire." The smug satisfaction on that face says it all—there's a twisted joy in debugging through chaos rather than preventing it in the first place.

Content You receive a high priority bug on production Some customers can't checkout You find the bug and apply a hotfix Now no customer can checkout matin.com Ber Bernie Bern Phil

Content Firefox Crash Log

Content GIT PUSH LIVE A GEEK'S FANTASY FESTIVAL THE JAVASCRIPTS - DJANGO AND THE PYTHONS ARMIN VAN BOOTSTRAP - JOHNNY CACHE RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE LEARNING - MICHAEL JSON - DEPECHE CODE KANYE TEST - ALT-JSX - AWS (LIVE SET) - QUEENS OF THE NODE AGE DIRE THREADS - NICKY MINAJAX - THE OFFSTRING - THE SUBSTRING AJAX AND THE FETCH - BLACK TERMINAL - SLACK SABBATH - ZZ INDEX FOO BAR FIGHTERS - BRUCE STRINGSTEEN TICKETS CAN BE FOUND ON YOUR PROJECT'S ISSUE TRACKER IMAGINED BY M SECTOR LAsS ISCLAIMER: ACEST AFIS ESTE UN PAMFLET. NICIUN NUME DE FORMATIE NU ESTE REAL CEL PUTIN NU DIN CTE STIM NOI.