The Self-Inflicted Code Review

Content WOW! HOW DID YOU GET LIKE THAT? Developers Every time I Developers comment my code JESUS CHRIST. I DO ONE Developers PUSH-UP. SHEN COMIX

Ah, the classic developer's dilemma: face the eldritch horror of writing a regex pattern or suffer the consequences. The guy's expression says it all—he'd rather draw half the deck than attempt to craft a regular expression that actually works. And honestly? Smart move. Writing regex is like trying to perform brain surgery while blindfolded and using chopsticks. Sure, some regex wizards exist, but for the rest of us mortals, we're just one character away from accidentally matching the entire internet or nothing at all. The true skill is knowing when to just take the 25 cards and preserve your sanity.

The eternal curse of fragile code! First panel: pure ecstasy after battling a bug for days. Hearts in eyes, maniacal grin—the universal face of "IT WORKS AND I DON'T KNOW WHY." Second panel: the horror when your code spontaneously combusts because you dared to look at it wrong. It's like that house of cards that collapses when someone three rooms away sneezes. The code doesn't just break—it takes personal offense at your happiness. This is why programmers develop trust issues with their own creations.

Oh. My. GOD. The DRAMA of JavaScript's this keyword is the ultimate betrayal! You're sitting there, coding away, when suddenly your program implodes and you scream "F*** THIS!" in righteous fury—only to realize the tragic irony that you literally have NO IDEA what "this" even is in your code! 😱 It's like screaming at a ghost you can't see! For the JavaScript-curious, this is that slippery little devil that changes meaning depending on context—sometimes it's the window, sometimes it's an object, sometimes it's whatever random thing bound to it. And don't even get me started on arrow functions changing all the rules! The AUDACITY!

Content 9 Dear programmer: 0 When I wrote this code, only God and I knew how it worked. 1 Now, only God knows it! 2 3 4 Therefore, if you are trying to optimize this routine and it fails (most surely it would). Please increase this counter as a warning for the next person 5 6 7 totalHoursWastedHere 300

Content Nick nicksfurry i didnt think i was very opinionated on code until i met someone that does it wrong 12:09 91021 Twitter for iPhone