The Programmer's Time Investment Strategy

Content A Guide to programming lanquages Pseudo-code: the language At least it's not assembly a At least it's not C A headache on every platform JS The tenth level of Dante's hell Expensive math Fortran The Ancient of Days

Content You prefer stability and simplicity. Keeping your memory segmented and tidy brings meaning to your life. You're probably also old Java You teach computer science and are focused on "applications" You've never written a single line of production code ano vounave vou were propaov an intern You graduated from unpaid intern to full blown junior programmer You now make android anne You work in game development or at Microsoft. You still say OOP is okay in moderation, and you can stop at anytime. (You are critically addicted to classes) Context free grammars? Graons ano Trees Design Patterns? Monads? eues? What are you talking about bro? I just do Data Science! You find C too simple for your own personal tastes. You'd rather debug templates for the rest of your life. Apparently it pavs well too You are also a masochist. People can't stop talking about you. Probably also identify as LGBTQ or a Furry. php You may have been dropped on vour head as a child You're a hyper nerd who was abused by Java and are currenty in your rebenious onase You also can't stop trying to tell people what a monad is CELILWrO A Greetings stranger, welcome to earth! Here we speak english! Did you know verbs sounds better when they go in front of the subject. Of course you didn't know that, because it isn't true. F I'm not sure what motivated you to use the literal oldestianguage in existence con Maybe you just like working on legacy code that predates the formation of the universe.

Content when asked to draw a flowchart of my code t.medev meme START MAGIC END

Content Advanced Volume Control Volume Control 0 2 X ) 11 21 31 41 51 61 81 91 100

Ah, the classic bait-and-switch. First we were all tied up with Stack Overflow, desperately patting it on the head for every error message we couldn't decipher. Then Elon swoops in with his Twitter/X rebrand, and suddenly our timelines are filled with developers dramatically announcing their migration to Bluesky, Mastodon, or whatever platform hasn't been "ruined" yet. Ten years in this industry and I've learned one universal truth: developers will spend more time complaining about where they're complaining than actually writing code. Meanwhile, that bug isn't going to fix itself while you're crafting the perfect farewell tweet.

Content Me Be me Find a cool project Ber Me Bernie It's under a FOSS license Bernie Me Bernie Written in one of the less popular languages you know Bern Lie Bernie Last commit: 14 hours ago Bernie ProdrammerHumor.io