Newbie Memes

Posts tagged with Newbie

I'm Not Mad I Just Want To Talk
Devops Git Programming Debugging Backend
2 days ago 58.6K views 0 shares
I'm Not Mad I Just Want To Talk
The classic "chess match with the dog" scenario we've all faced. Some junior dev just hard-coded environment variables directly into the build pipeline instead of using config files, and now your changes mysteriously vanish in production while everything passes in staging. That innocent face says it all – they have no idea they've created a deployment hellscape that'll take you three days and seven coffees to untangle. Meanwhile, they're getting praised for "making things work" while you contemplate a career in sheep farming.

GitHub No Exe
Git Webdev Programming
1 month ago 99.4K views 0 shares
GitHub No Exe
OH. MY. GOD. Someone just discovered GitHub isn't the download section of Best Buy! 😱 The ABSOLUTE TRAGEDY of trying to find that precious .exe file on a platform that's LITERALLY DESIGNED for source code sharing! It's like walking into a library and having a meltdown because they don't sell hamburgers! THE HORROR! GitHub stores CODE, sweetie - you know, those magical text files developers use before they're compiled into executables? You're supposed to clone the repo or download the source and build it yourself like a grown-up developer! But sure, let's blame the "weirdest file sharing site" because clicking that big green "Code" button and understanding what a repository is would be TOO MUCH EFFORT! 💅

Wait, It's All Just Collision Detection?
Gamedev Unity Algorithms Physics Programming
1 month ago 95.2K views 0 shares
Wait, It's All Just Collision Detection?
The existential crisis every new game developer faces when they realize their entire career is just figuring out how to make different shapes not pass through each other. After years of education and dreams of creating the next Elden Ring, it all boils down to "wait, is that box touching that other box?" and "why is this character's arm suddenly disappearing into the wall?" The veterans with the gun have always known the truth - collision detection is the real final boss that never goes away.

Welcome To The Red Team, Junior
Security Networking Programming Testing
1 month ago 108.5K views 0 shares
Welcome To The Red Team, Junior
That moment when the fresh CS grad in a Hawaiian shirt meets the grizzled security expert who's been breaking systems since before the internet had a name. "Red team" isn't about communism, kid—it's about showing companies how spectacularly their security fails by actively hacking them. The beard alone has seen more zero-days than your entire GitHub history. Hope you brought caffeine for the all-nighter ahead—those corporate firewalls won't pentest themselves!