Licensing Memes

Posts tagged with Licensing

VSphere Is Still Pretty Great, But...

VSphere Is Still Pretty Great, But...
Server admin calmly stating "vSphere is still pretty great" until someone mentions "BROADCOM." Then the rage sets in. It's like mentioning printer drivers at an IT party - instant mood killer. For the uninitiated, Broadcom acquired VMware (maker of vSphere) and proceeded to change licensing models faster than developers change their minds about frameworks. Nothing says "enterprise stability" like your virtualization provider getting acquired and immediately making your budget explode.

The Mythical WinRAR Customer

The Mythical WinRAR Customer
The rarest creature in the digital universe: someone who actually wants to pay for WinRAR. The robot, personified as WinRAR, is so shocked it's practically having an existential crisis. For those uninitiated, WinRAR is that compression software that's been asking for payment after its 40-day trial since the dawn of computing, yet somehow continues to function perfectly when you click "remind me later" for the 500th time. It's basically the software equivalent of that friend who keeps saying "you'll pay me back next time" knowing full well it's never happening.

Legendary Day At The WinRAR HQ

Legendary Day At The WinRAR HQ
The eternal miracle of WinRAR's business model: create software, ask people to pay, and then just... never enforce it. That tiny spike on their revenue chart is like spotting a unicorn in the wild—someone actually purchased the software instead of clicking "remind me later" for the 7,483rd time. The WinRAR office is throwing confetti because someone accidentally hit "Buy" instead of "X" after their 40-day trial expired in 1997. Their CEO probably framed the receipt and hung it next to their lone customer's photo. "Is this... profit? What do we even do with this?"

When Ubuntu Has An Identity Crisis

When Ubuntu Has An Identity Crisis
When your Linux distro starts giving you Windows flashbacks! That "Activate Ubuntu" message is giving serious "Activate Windows" watermark energy. Free and open-source software asking to be activated? What's next—sudo apt-get install microsoft-identity-crisis? The irony of Ubuntu—whose name literally means "humanity to others" in African philosophy—demanding activation like some proprietary software is just *chef's kiss* perfect. Someone at Canonical clearly spent too much time dual-booting.

Broadcom's Explosive Pricing Strategy

Broadcom's Explosive Pricing Strategy
Gearing up for the budget apocalypse! Nothing says "enterprise IT" like putting on a bomb suit to tell executives they need to fork over another 50% for VMware licenses while they simultaneously reject your migration requests due to "cost concerns." The irony is thicker than the blast-proof helmet. Ever since Broadcom's acquisition, IT departments worldwide have been practicing their explosion-resistant budget presentations. It's not a price increase—it's a "value adjustment opportunity."

Apache 2 Attack Helicopter

Apache 2 Attack Helicopter
Whoever wrote this FAQ has clearly ascended to a higher plane of software licensing enlightenment. They've taken the Apache 2 license—normally a boring legal document—and transformed it into a manifesto for digital anarchism. The beauty here is how they've weaponized open source ideology into literal weapons. "Put it in your ballistic missiles" is peak programmer fantasy—imagining your code has such power that it could display a multilingual "FUCK YOU" before nuclear annihilation. And the final touch—mailing bricks to Richard Stallman while taunting him with a bullhorn—is the chef's kiss of free software rebellion. It's like saying "I'm so free I'll use your freedom against you."

Corporations Are Not Your Friends

Corporations Are Not Your Friends
That cute open-source project with 10k GitHub stars? Just wait until BigTech acquires it and slaps a $49.99/month "enterprise" tier on features that used to be free. Remember when MongoDB changed their license because AWS was eating their lunch? Or when Docker suddenly needed to "monetize" after years of free containers? The corporate circle of life: embrace, extend, extinguish... and extract your credit card info. The only relationship these companies want is with your wallet.

Justice For EU Residents!!!

Justice For EU Residents!!!
That crushing moment when you discover an awesome software giveaway on r/pcmasterrace only to find the dreaded "US Residents Only" fine print. European devs get to build the software but can't win the free licenses. The digital equivalent of seeing a buffet through a restaurant window while starving. Next they'll tell us Stack Overflow karma can't be exchanged for healthcare either.

Producing Product In Production

Producing Product In Production
The duality of modern coding life. First panel: "OMG, GitHub Copilot is free in VS Code?!" *frantically puts on glasses to see clearly* Second panel: "Wait... my code is free for GitHub Copilot?" *realization sets in* Remember when we used to worry about other devs stealing our code? Now we're feeding the AI overlords our precious algorithms so they can regurgitate them to junior devs who'll get paid more than us. The circle of tech life, folks.

Unity Bad, OpenGL Good

Unity Bad, OpenGL Good
Left: Game dev crying because Unity changed their pricing model and now they need a second mortgage to make a 2D platformer. Right: The bearded C++ developer who's been writing their own engine since 2003 and still hasn't released a game, but boy does that skybox rendering look crisp. It's the classic tradeoff - use a commercial engine and get destroyed by licensing fees, or build your own and get destroyed by feature creep. Either way, your game is never shipping.