The Digital Aristocracy

Content ATM machine programmers in 2022: Should I choose Windows XP or continue on Windows 98 ya. krishna.meme

Your company-issued laptop is basically a fortune-telling device for your career trajectory. Dell? Corporate drone with a ticking clock. MacBook? Startup darling living paycheck-to-funding-round. But if they hand you a ThinkPad, congratulations on your involuntary lifetime appointment! That red TrackPoint nub might as well be a ball and chain. The laptop doesn't just run your code—it's running the simulation of your entire professional future.

The human brain: allocating 23% CPU and 2.4GB of RAM to thinking about sex, 8% to lunch plans, and a measly 2.4% to actually finding that seg fault. Meanwhile, writing documentation and unit tests are running in the background with 0% CPU utilization. Priorities perfectly aligned for maximum debugging inefficiency. The real kicker? Those embarrassing memories from 2007 somehow consuming 1.2GB of memory that could've been used to solve the actual problem. But hey, at least "Incoming Bowel Movement" is only using 0.1% CPU - small victories.

Content Delete Windows? Your computer's running low on storage space. We can create some space by deleting Windows. Delete Dismiss

Ah, the classic tale of the tech-illiterate conspiracy theorist who thinks they've uncovered the grand Microsoft deception. System32 is literally just the core Windows directory containing critical system files—delete it and congratulations, you've bricked your computer! The December 31, 1969 date is actually Unix epoch time (January 1, 1970 UTC) minus a timezone offset—basically the computer equivalent of "the beginning of time." It's what systems show when a file has no valid timestamp. But sure, go ahead and "save yourself 700kb" by deleting essential system files. I'm sure your computer will run so much faster in its new state as an expensive paperweight.

Content are you an idiot? yes no do you have a life? yes mac Windows no LINUX