My First Joke Is Already A Sequel Joke

Content Italian Elon (Parody, Italy is Fake) DeepFriedTrash I fire the programmadores to make a the app go faster, ohhh! A-business!

Content Run it again. Even if you didn't change anything. Just do it.

Content Employee claims she can't use Microsoft Windows for "Religious Reasons". gets IT to provide laptop with Linux. rAskHR Posted by u-puppy-guppy- 19 hours ago 6 Policy Procedures UPDATEGA Employee claims she can't use Microsoft Windows for "Religious Reasons" Original Post UPDATE: After many meetings yesterday with management, HR, legal, and IT we decided to give her a shot. IT is working to come up with a configuration for her that we will also make available to other employees who want to use it. HR and Legal felt that although she is able to request accommodations for a sincerely held religious belief, this would have been an undue hardship to the company and it would be ok for us to deny her request. But ultimately we decided that she can still fulfill job requirements without Windows! That's pretty much it. Thank you for all the helpful advice Reddit!

Content Skills and knowledge by occupation-Hard Skills PHP Proficiency Javascript Expert (query Expert (SQL Expert (Git experienced level (BoostrapTailwind Mastery Lava Intellis IDEA Beginner React Beginner (JSON Beginner (CSS Experience Level . Additional additional skills - Soft Skills (VSphere turn off the server (SAP joint domain (CMD access to the LAN head (Joint group Computer within the organization (VNC language skills language skills Thai speaking very good listening very good reading very good writing very good

Nothing teaches you like a production server on fire at 2 AM. That tiny stack of theory books? That's your CS degree. The practice pile? That's your first year on the job. But that towering monument of green books? That's the knowledge you've gained by accidentally dropping the production database, pushing to main on Friday, or forgetting that arrays start at zero for the 500th time. The most valuable developer skills aren't taught in bootcamps—they're forged in the flames of catastrophic failure. My resume says "10 years of experience" but it should really say "10 years of increasingly spectacular mistakes."

You know that moment when your database query takes 47 seconds to run and you're sitting there like "surely this is fine"? Then reality hits and you're frantically slapping EXPLAIN on that bad boy to figure out which table scan is eating your lunch. Turns out joining 6 tables without indexes while doing a substring match on a million rows wasn't your brightest idea. Who would've thought? Now you're in full detective mode, adding indexes like they're going out of style and rewriting that monstrosity you called a query. The real kicker? After all that optimization, you realize you could've just cached the result. Classic.