AI Recommends The Void Over Actual Database

Content Q Search Messaging Q Search messages Jan 13 InMail Exciting Senior Level Software Engineering... Load more conversations Home 14 My Network Jobs 24 Messaging Notifications Managing Director Technology at in Recruiter Jan 13 About Acct Privacy 7 Advertising Get the I Linked in Link Leading Technology Firm Needs YOU!! NY, NY!! Hi first Name, I am currently driving search for a rapidly growing and leading tech firm called (formerlv ) and they are going through a major expansion. 's mission is to make advertising matter. They build products that provide consumers with positive, safe ad experiences, and they build industry- leading powerful, intuitive workflows that enable advertisers to successfully execute on their objectives. They are looking to bring on multiple Senior level Software Engineers to their Creative team. Here are some of the responsibilities and requirements: Responsibilities: Collaborate with Engineers on the team to build intuitive products that address the needs of our customers . Write code at all Latest message n user interface to SOL querv to backend code Yes, interested... No thanks... Thank you for your well-thought out message, Mr. lastName. Unfortunately I don't think companyName will be a good fit for me right now as my experience in jobDescriptor is better suited elsewhere. Best of luck in the future and I hope currentYear? treats vou well! Sincerelv, firstName Send

A critical MongoDB vulnerability that sat dormant for 8 years (2017-2025) just got discovered, letting attackers yank out heap data like passwords and API keys through a malformed zlib request. The bug was literally committed in June 2017 and merged into production. The fix? Written in December 2025. That's an 8-year nap. But here's the kicker: there are over 213,000 potentially vulnerable MongoDB instances exposed to the internet. The punchline? "ensuring that this exploit is web scale ." 😂 For context, "web scale" is a legendary meme from a satirical video where someone hilariously defends MongoDB's design choices with buzzwords. Now it's come full circle—MongoDB's vulnerability is literally web scale with 213k+ exposed instances. MongoDB also claims "no evidence" of exploitation despite the bug being trivially simple for 8 years. Sure, Jan. Oh, and they haven't apologized yet. Classic.

Content Mwaniki Wanjiku WanjikuMw... 11h V Replying to Prathkum How old is too old to start learning programming? 91 17 02 1 Brook Jordan BrookJordan: 10h 02 172 21 1

Little Timmy tried to be clever by literally injecting SQL into his name to transfer himself from the naughty list to the nice list. Classic Bobby Tables move, but Santa's not running a database—he's running Excel spreadsheets. Multiple interconnected ones. Because apparently the North Pole's IT department peaked in 1995. The joke is that SQL injection attacks only work on actual databases, not on Excel files where Santa probably has formulas like =IF(VLOOKUP(A2,NaughtyList!A:B,2,FALSE)="Naughty","Coal","Toys") spread across 47 different tabs with names like "NaughtyList_FINAL_v3_USE_THIS_ONE.xlsx" Security through obsolescence is undefeated. Sorry Timmy, should've tried a macro virus instead.

The punchline here is a perfect double entendre. Tinder, a dating app all about making "relationships," stores its data in a "relational" database. It's a database joke that hits on two levels - technical accuracy and dating wordplay. Somewhere, a database administrator is quietly chuckling while running SELECT queries in the dark.

Content L Anonymous 122614(Fri) 19:51:11 No. 45793352 B 45793379 45794765 45794788 45796081 45799058 45800174 why the fuck start ups only want ruby on rails developers? Anonymous 122614(Fri)22:01:48 No. 45794867 45794890 45798725 45798760 45799182 45799190 45799231 45800065 It's hipster technology. They create an internet startup with Rails or Node.js on top of MongoDB. They have a io domain with a name that normally ends in -er but they removed the 'e'. They code in Sublime Text on their Macbooks while sitting in Starbucks. When people ask about their work they refer to themselves as a "code artisan".