I Know What You Are

The handshake between Mr. Krabs and Patrick Star perfectly symbolizes the unspoken alliance of suffering that programmers and artists share. While we're busy arguing about tabs vs. spaces or RGB vs. CMYK, some CEO is slapping their name on our 2AM caffeine-fueled creation. Nothing quite builds solidarity like watching your Git commits or Photoshop layers get repackaged as "executive vision." The real kicker? The stolen code probably runs better than when I wrote it, but that's beside the point.

Content A fresher programmer with 10k stars, 100 OS projects and 100k SO reputation Noob programmer Corporate needs you to find the differences between this picture and this picture Recruiter They're the same picture. imaflip.com

Content JAVASCRIPT IS COUNTER-STRIKE COOL BUT GETS WORSE THE MORE YOU UNDERSTAND C IS DARK SOULS You'rE KIlleD BY THE TUTORIAL BOll IF PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES WERE GAMES toggl KOTLIN IS TETRIS BUILT BY COMMUNISM, RUNS ON CAPITALISM HASKELL IS DUNGEONS DRAGOnS IT WOULD BE COOL IF YOU ACTUALLY STARTED PLAYING C IS TIC-TAC-TOE EASY, UNLESS YOU'RE PLAYING AGAINST THE MACHINE JAVA IS DOOM RUnS ON 3 BILlioN DEVICES PERL IS HIDE-AND-SEEK DOESN'T MATTER IF YOU'RE HIDING, BECAUSE NO ONE IS LOOKING SWIFT IS MONOPOLY A LESSON IN CORPORATE GREED ASSEMBLY IS A COUPLE OF NAILS AND A PLANK YOU CALL IT "LEGO" PHP IS AN ELEPHANT BEATING You TO DEATH WITH A PADDLE -BALL DART IS THE GAme YoU LOST.

Ah yes, the classic YouTube programming guru suggesting binary is easier than learning Unicode. Because nothing says "beginner-friendly" like manually typing 01001000 01100101 01101100 01101100 01101111 instead of just "Hello". And that 50% success rate is technically correct—the best kind of correct. Either it works or it doesn't. Just like how I have a 50% chance of winning the lottery: I either win or I don't. Flawless logic.

Content Why isn't it working I'm going to kill myself I'm getting crazv I love coding

Python's having an existential crisis while JavaScript is just vibing with string math. The expression '3'-'1' in Python throws a tantrum because strings can't be subtracted (how dare you try to violate type rules!). Meanwhile, JavaScript's like "2, duh" because it'll happily convert your strings to numbers and do the math anyway. Classic JavaScript - solving problems you didn't know you had by creating problems you never wanted. That traceback is the sound of Python's dignity remaining intact while refusing to do your questionable arithmetic.