The Ultimate Developer Nightmare

Content grey jena tweetsbyweber Dear recruiters, if you are looking for: - Java, Python, PHP - React, Angular - PostgreSQL, Redis, MongoDB - AWS, S3, EC2, ECS, EKS - nix system administration - Git and Cl with TDD - Docker, Kubernetes That's not a Full Stack Developer That's an entire IT department

JavaScript gets all the love while C, Java, Rust, and others gang up on poor PHP. Then in the shadows, we find the true outcasts: another PHP developer and the mythical Monkey C programmer, sweating nervously because nobody even remembers they exist. The programming language hierarchy in one comic! JavaScript strutting around like it owns the web (it kinda does), while PHP gets bullied despite powering like 80% of the internet. And Monkey C? That's the language you put on your resume when you're hoping the interviewer is too embarrassed to admit they've never heard of it.

The job market hierarchy in full display! First panel: hopeful programmer asking if anyone needs their services. Second panel: crushing rejection and existential crisis ensues. Third panel: suddenly someone needs a developer! Fourth panel: plot twist—it's for PHP and the dramatic lightning effects perfectly capture every modern developer's internal screaming. The ultimate programming food chain where PHP sits at the bottom of the desirability spectrum. Even desperate unemployed devs have standards! It's basically the equivalent of saying "I need someone to maintain this COBOL codebase from 1972 with zero documentation."

Content o parent Tavorite on: Pornhub Adult content Montreal QC On-site pornhub.com (NSFW) Come work at the 22nd highest trafficked website in the world. We are looking for: -PHP developers -Senior front-end developers -Senior Product Manager -Senior UIUX designer Must be willing to relocate to Montreal. Email me your CV: A PHP DEV I'm interested but I don't think I'd be comfortable telling my friends and family that's what I do all day -1 That is understandable. I don't think I would be comfortable telling my family that I develop PHP either.

Behold, the perfect visual representation of a recursive function with no base case! That knitted head is what happens to your server when you call explode() inside itself. The function keeps calling itself forever until your stack memory looks like that poor little knitted character—completely blown up. The only thing missing is the server admin's face when they get the 3AM alert.

The eighth circle of hell isn't fire and brimstone—it's debugging someone else's PHP code without documentation. Forcing trespassers to untangle nested if-statements and figure out why everything is both a string and not a string simultaneously is just cruel. Geneva convention violation right there. The perfect punishment for those who ignore boundaries, both physical and programmatic.