The Accidental Launch Countdown

Content Dear Family and Friends.I am a programmer, I make Softwares and programmes. -Blackbeltdevs.com I don't repair Computers, Printers, Chargers, Televisions Cars and Tractors. Please be warned.

Content Contribute code to the Fox News and Fox Business iOS, tvOS and watchOS projects Write idiomatic Swift code that is clean, readable and maintainable WHAT YOU WILL NEED BS or higher in Computer Science or related field 8 years experience in iOS Development using Swift Portfolio of iOS apps in the App Store A deep understanding of mobile ad technologies and concepts (VAST, MAP) Experience with the following SDKs: Google Mobile Ads SDK Google Interactive Media Ads SDK (IMA) Experience with header bidding solutions (Prebid.js, Amazon, Index) Swift Programming language Swift is a general-purpose, multi-paradigm, compiled programming language developed by Apple Inc. for iOS, iPadOS, macOS, watchOs, tvOs, and Linux. Swift is designed to work with Apple's Cocoa and Cocoa Touch frameworks and the large body of existing Objective-C code written for Apple products. Wikipedia Stable release: 5.2.3 April 29, 2020; 46 days ago Preview release: 5.3 branch Typing discipline: Static, strong, inferred First appeared: June 2, 2014; 6 years ago OS: macOS, Darwin, Linux, FreeBSD, Windows Me in My 6 years of iOS dev experience

Content 10 WAYS TO TROLL YOUR DEVELOPER 1: CHANGE ALL CONSOLE SETTINGS TO BLACK ON BLACK. STRANGE.. NO DEBUG PRINTOUTS 2: HAVE THEM FIX OLD CODE. 3: REQUIRE IT TO WORK ON ALL PLATFORMS. IT WILL HAVE TO RUN ON IOS, ANDROID, WINDOWS PHONE AND THIS ROTARY FROM 1931. 4: HIRE UNQUALIFIED DEVELOPERS. CHAD WILLBE DOING UI. :DISREGARD ANY NEED FOPTESTING A TESTING PHASE (ISN'T REALLY IN THE BUDGET. IT'S JUST GONNA HAVE TO WORK B 6: REQUIRE IT TO WORK FOR ALL USER GROUPS. MR. NIBBLES SAID ITS VERY UNINTUITIVE. MEOW. 7: POP YOUR HEAD IN EVERY FIVE MINUTES TO BOND OVER YOUR STUPID COWORKERS SHARON USES A QUESTION MARK WHEN SHE GOOGLES A QUESTION. ! 8: BLOCK ALL ACCESS TO STACK OVERFLOW. NOW, NOW, NO CHEATIN VELD 9: MAKE ALL TASKS TOP PRIORIT THE DATABASE NEEDS TO BE UP AND RUNNING ASAP, AS WELL AS THE AUDIO ENGINE, CRITICAL AND ALSO 3D BUTTON SHADING. 10:ASK A DEV TO 'FIX YOUR COMPUTER' MR. NIBBLES WAS WATCHING GOOD WIFE AND SUDDENLY THIS BLOC THINGY CAME 70 re War and Peas

Content GLOBAL CROWDSTRIKE OUTAGE CODING ON PERSONAL MACBOOK ProdrammerHumor.io

Dell's uninstaller is treating you like you've never encountered the concept of deletion before. "Click Remove to remove" followed by "this program will no longer be available for use" is the software equivalent of explaining that water is wet. The dramatic movie scene below perfectly captures the existential crisis one experiences when faced with such profound wisdom. It's like Dell thinks we might believe uninstalling their software merely sends it on vacation to the Bahamas rather than, you know, actually removing it from existence. Next they'll add a warning that says "Breathing is recommended for continued survival."

Oh honey, the AUDACITY of these cloud providers! 💅 First, Microsoft Azure is all "Our service is AMAZING!" Then the second you commit, they hit you with "Sorry, it's broken and our devs are too busy updating their LinkedIn profiles to fix it." The betrayal! Google Cloud's "FREE" service is the tech equivalent of that friend who offers to buy lunch then Venmos you for $47.82 plus tip. FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS?! I could've bought a mediocre gaming PC for that! And AWS? "It's EASY!" they say, right before you need a PhD in AWSology and an AI assistant just to figure out how to deploy a simple "Hello World." The documentation is basically "Figure it out, genius!" This is why developers have trust issues and drink coffee by the gallon. The cloud promised us heaven but delivered a very expensive, very complicated hell.