Onboarding Memes

Posts tagged with Onboarding

Did You Complete Them: The Corporate Training Paradox
Programming Security Testing
4 days ago 65.1K views 0 shares
Did You Complete Them: The Corporate Training Paradox
Corporate training modules: the final boss of workplace tedium. First panel shows the truth—they're outdated, ineffective digital zombies that HR unleashes upon us. Second panel reveals the grim reality—we've all morphed into those expressionless NPCs, mindlessly announcing "completion" just to make them go away. The transformation is complete when you realize you've spent 4 hours clicking through a security training that could've been a single email saying "don't use 'password123'." The greatest fiction in software engineering isn't AI consciousness—it's pretending anyone actually learns from these things.

The Mythical Man-Month
Agile Devops Programming Testing
5 days ago 71.8K views 0 shares
The Mythical Man-Month
OH. MY. GOD. The absolute TRAGEDY of project management in its purest form! 💀 This comic is the most SAVAGE takedown of Brooks' Law ever - "adding manpower to a late software project makes it later." The manager's solution to missing deadlines? THROW MORE BODIES AT IT! Because CLEARLY nine women can make a baby in one month! 🙄 And the DELICIOUS irony of ending up FURTHER behind after onboarding the new devs? *chef's kiss* That's the cognitive dissonance that fuels the entire tech industry! The final panel with "maybe we need a bigger room" instead of, I don't know, ACTUALLY FIXING THE PROJECT MANAGEMENT ISSUES?! I'm deceased! 💀 Fun fact: "The Mythical Man-Month" is a legendary software engineering book from 1975 that basically said what every developer already knows but no manager will ever admit - throwing more people at a late project is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline!

The Mentor's Dilemma
Programming Agile StackOverflow Debugging
7 days ago 75.2K views 0 shares
The Mentor's Dilemma
That moment of existential crisis when you realize you're either training your replacement or your future headache. Nothing like wondering if this new dev will be the one who actually reads documentation or just another copy-paste warrior who'll break production with Stack Overflow solutions. The real question isn't whether they're smart—it's whether you'll spend the next six months fixing their "creative interpretations" of your codebase.

Mission Successful
Programming Debugging
19 days ago 61.9K views 0 shares
Mission Successful
When a junior dev thinks the codebase is some kind of rocket science, but the senior devs are just celebrating that someone else has to deal with their spaghetti code now! 🍝👨‍💻 The seniors are partying like NASA after a successful mission while the junior is completely clueless that the "complex" code is actually just years of technical debt and hacks held together with digital duct tape. It's the classic dev team initiation - welcome to the chaos you poor, innocent soul!

Credential Cycling Catastrophe
Cloud Security Devops Programming
21 days ago 98.7K views 0 shares
Credential Cycling Catastrophe
Ah, the classic "$10,000/hour AWS bill of doom" scenario! This comic perfectly captures that moment when you realize your AWS keys have been chilling in public longer than that Minecraft world you've been building. 🙃 The best part? That well-meaning onboarding where someone tells you to rotate keys every "3-6 months" and you're like "totally, absolutely, 100%" while mentally filing that under "things I'll definitely forget until catastrophe strikes." Cloud security is just like flossing - everyone knows they should do it regularly, but somehow we're all too busy playing Minecraft to remember until our teeth (or AWS account) are on fire. 🔥💸

Please Sir Can I Have Some Code
Programming Devops Agile Debugging Backend
28 days ago 90.6K views 1 shares
Please Sir Can I Have Some Code
This meme perfectly captures the existential dread of asking a senior developer about their non-existent documentation. You approach them like Oliver Twist begging for gruel, only to be met with the classic "my code is self-explanatory" defense. The senior dev genuinely believes their cryptic variable names and 200-line functions "make perfect sense" while you're left wondering if you're the problem. Spoiler alert: you're not. The documentation is in their head, and they've convinced themselves that telepathy is an industry standard skill.