Job security Memes

Posts tagged with Job security

The Perfect Crime: No Comments

The Perfect Crime: No Comments
Ah, the perfect crime! The programmer wrote code so illegible that not even he could explain it to the authorities. The real criminal offense wasn't whatever got him detained—it was his refusal to write comments in his spaghetti code. Bet his teammates already wanted him locked up anyway. The ultimate job security: code so cryptic that firing you would be corporate suicide.

The Self-Sustaining Developer Ecosystem

The Self-Sustaining Developer Ecosystem
The circle of software development life in four panels. The dev who fixed the bug gets praised by colleagues, feeling like a hero for about 5 minutes. Meanwhile, the same dev who introduced the bug in the first place stays suspiciously quiet about that part. Classic job security strategy – break things just enough that you become indispensable when you fix them. It's not a bug, it's a career advancement feature.

Looking At You Ml Experts

Looking At You Ml Experts
Ah, the classic bell curve of AI anxiety. The folks at the low end of the IQ spectrum are blissfully confident they can't be replaced because they don't understand what's coming. The geniuses at the high end know they're safe because they're the ones building the AI overlords. Meanwhile, the rest of us in the middle—just smart enough to understand the threat but not brilliant enough to be irreplaceable—are sweating bullets. This is basically the tech industry's version of "ignorance is bliss" meets "knowledge is power," with the vast majority of us stuck in purgatory. Twenty years in this field and I'm still not sure if I should be learning to code better or learning to make coffee for the robots.

Remotely Access Files Through A String Of Text

Remotely Access Files Through A String Of Text
OH. MY. GOD. This is the most SPECTACULAR self-own in tech history! 💀 Someone brags they "made an entire website with ChatGPT" (revolutionary, groundbreaking, Nobel Prize material 🙄) only to share their masterpiece via a LOCAL FILE PATH that only exists on THEIR computer! That's like saying "I baked you a cake" and then sending a picture of your refrigerator! The absolute DRAMA of thinking AI stole our jobs while not understanding how the internet works is just *chef's kiss* magnificent. Honey, if you can't tell the difference between a URL and a file path, programmers' jobs are safer than diamonds in a volcano!

If It Works, Don't Touch It

If It Works, Don't Touch It
That network switch has clearly been running flawlessly since the Clinton administration. Covered in dust, cobwebs, and what appears to be ancient plaster, it's the digital equivalent of that one load-bearing piece of code written by someone who left the company 8 years ago. Touch it? Might as well pull the pin on a grenade while you're at it. This is why network engineers develop that thousand-yard stare by year five.

Job Security In AAA Right Now

Job Security In AAA Right Now
Ah, the gaming industry's version of a Catch-22. Warner Bros just axed multiple game studios regardless of their performance. It's like working at a restaurant where the chef gets fired whether the food is terrible, amazing, or breaks Michelin star records. The gaming industry's new business strategy: "Let's fire everyone and see if that helps quarterly earnings." Spoiler alert: it won't, but some executive will get a nice bonus for "optimizing workforce resources." Nothing says "we value creativity" like shutting down studios that made incredibly successful games. Next quarter's strategy meeting: "Why can't we find good talent?"

We'Re Safe..

We'Re Safe..
Oh, the eternal job security of dealing with clients who say they want a "simple website" but actually mean "Facebook but better" with a budget of $200. The AI apocalypse might be coming for some jobs, but programmers can sleep soundly knowing that no robot will ever decipher "make it pop" or "I'll know what I want when I see it." Our superpower isn't coding—it's somehow building functional software from requirements that change faster than JavaScript frameworks.

Question Was Asked To An Ex-Twitter Engineer

Question Was Asked To An Ex-Twitter Engineer
When asked "How does it feel knowing that the software you work on will probably break soon?" the ex-Twitter engineer's response is simply: "Normal." This is peak software engineering nihilism! After Elon's takeover and mass layoffs, Twitter's remaining code base is basically held together with digital duct tape and a prayer. The single-word answer perfectly captures what every developer secretly thinks: our code is always one deploy away from catastrophic failure. It's not pessimism—it's just Tuesday in tech.

Job Security

Job Security
When your entire job is testing one new feature per year at Apple! 😂 The meme shows the legendary "waiting" Pablo Escobar meme format but reimagined for Apple's QA team who supposedly have the cushiest job ever - just chilling around all year waiting for that single new feature to test. Meanwhile at other tech companies, QA engineers are drowning in sprints and backlogs! That's what I call work-life balance taken to the extreme!

Scrum Masters Are Safe

Scrum Masters Are Safe
Ah, the ultimate job security plan! Turns out the one person AI won't replace is the colleague who contributes absolutely nothing. That sweet spot where you're so useless that even automation can't justify the ROI of replacing you. It's like finding a bug so bizarre that QA just labels it as "expected behavior" and moves on. The perfect defense against technological unemployment isn't upskilling—it's strategic incompetence!

It Dont Matter To Me

It Dont Matter To Me
This meme perfectly captures the chaotic indifference of a developer who's just set the world on fire. While production is literally burning in the background (thanks to their code), they're just chilling with that smug little smile knowing their paycheck remains unaffected by the digital apocalypse they've unleashed. The ultimate "not my problem anymore" energy that every developer secretly relates to when they push that questionable code on Friday at 4:59 PM. The beautiful marriage of catastrophic failure and complete financial security - truly the dream!

Karma Is Real

Karma Is Real
Oh the sweet, sweet irony! 😂 Remember when everyone was freaking out that ChatGPT would replace developers? Now we've got Deepseek coming for ChatGPT's throne! It's like watching AI cannibalism in real-time - the robots are eating each other before they even get to our jobs! The circle of tech life continues... today's disruptor becomes tomorrow's disrupted. Guess ChatGPT should update its resume and start practicing those interview questions! Even AI can't escape the relentless march of newer, shinier technology!