Taste Of Your Own Medicine

Content Sarah Barr Sarah Barr Explaining the peer review process to my brother, a carpenter academia phdlife AcademicTwitter Imagine spending 2 years making a table and then showing someone and they tell you every tiny detail wrong with it 2:40 PM A So you fix everything they say and then show some more people and they tell you everything STILL wrong with it 2.40 PM One of them asks why you made it with 4 legs when it would have been much more stable with 8 legs 2:40 PM Another says this table is too heavy, it should have shorter legs 240 PM The third one says the table is fine but did you consider making a chair instead? 2.40 PM 7:31 AM 2022-09-08 Twitter Web App

Content threezk What my computer sees when I stare at my code for hours trying to find the problem instead of using a debugging tool 11:37 AM 2019-10-18 Twitter for iPhone ProarammerHumor.io

Ah, the seven deadly archetypes of every engineering team. I've worked with all of these people, and I've been all these people—sometimes in the same sprint. My personal favorite is "The Silent Operator" who hasn't spoken since the company holiday party of 2019 but somehow commits the exact fix at 2 AM while everyone else is arguing in Slack. And don't get me started on "The System Rebuilder." Sure, event sourcing sounds amazing in theory—right up until you're explaining to the CEO why the shopping cart needs six months of refactoring. The real unicorn is someone who's none of these. If you find them, lock the door and hide their passport.

The eternal programmer's dilemma captured perfectly! On the left, we have the desperate developer frantically searching for documentation like Batman on a vengeance quest: "WHERE IS IT?!" Meanwhile, on the right is Bugs Bunny with that smug "NO" when it's their turn to write documentation. This is basically every codebase ever. We all want comprehensive docs when we're trying to understand someone else's cryptic code, but when it's time to document our own "perfectly self-explanatory" masterpiece? Suddenly we're too busy for such trivial matters. The hypocrisy is *chef's kiss*.

Content Can you lick the science? Chemistry: NO!! DO NOT!!! Geology: Sometimes needed, sometimes dangerous Psychology: Best not Physics: WTF??? How??? Zoology: In Zoology, science licks you. Computer science: The tingle of electricity on your tongue is how you know it's working Software engineering: Nothing else has made the code work so you might as well try Astronomy: Look, if your dedication to lick Uranus is what it takes to get humankind to another planet, then so be it.

The perfect programming double entendre! In software development, exceptions are literally designed to handle special cases without affecting the main code flow. That's their entire purpose! Any developer who's written a try/catch block is silently screaming at this tweet. The irony is just *chef's kiss* - teachers using "exception" as an excuse not to make exceptions, while programmers create exceptions specifically to handle unique situations. The compiler would be so disappointed.