I Am An Indie Hacker

Remember pulling all-nighters to code that entire e-commerce platform from scratch for your "final project"? Fast forward to your professional life where writing a simple validation function has you like: "I've contributed enough to capitalism today." The greatest scam in tech is that we wrote entire operating systems for free as students, but now get paid six figures to update a button color and call it a sprint. Work smarter, not harder – that's what the salary is really for.

Ah, the prestigious VibeCode Conference, where you can register right now at... localhost. Sure, I'll just hop on over to my own machine to sign up for an event that exists exclusively in my development environment. Nothing says "professional event planning" like forgetting to change the URL from development to production. I guess the only attendees will be 127.0.0.1 and ::1.

The eternal developer job interview charade! Someone proudly claims they know "3 languages" which sounds impressive until they're pressed to name them. Turns out it's just the frontend trinity of JavaScript, HTML, and CSS. The interviewer's polite "thank you" speaks volumes—like claiming you're a polyglot because you know English, American English, and Australian English. Not exactly the C++, Rust, and Haskell flex they were hoping for. The classic "I'm a full-stack developer" starter pack strikes again!

Nothing like family members who think web development is just dragging a few buttons around for an hour. Dad's out here brokering £500 deals for a "normal screen size" website while his kid is wondering if this requires a full CMS, e-commerce integration, or just 47 revisions of "make the logo bigger." The best part? Dad has absolutely no idea what goes into building a website but is confidently volunteering his child's expertise like it's a quick favor. That £500 will cover about 1/10th of the therapy needed after the client says "I want it to be like Amazon but better."

When your LinkedIn title needs to sound fancier than "I fix other people's garbage code." The sudden epidemic of "Vibe Coding Cleanup Specialists" is what happens when developers collectively realize nobody wants to admit they're just janitors for spaghetti code. Nothing says "I've seen things that would make a junior dev cry" quite like rebranding debugging as "vibe cleanup." Bonus points for "Overengineering Specialist" – because why solve a problem simply when you can build an entire framework around it?

OH MY GODDD! The cursor is NOT ALIGNED with the actual clickable area! 😱 The red lines expose this TRAVESTY of UI design that's been haunting us since the dawn of computing! Your mouse is clicking on a LIE! A COMPLETE FABRICATION! The pointer's tip doesn't match where it actually registers clicks, and now you'll notice this digital deception EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. you use your computer. Sweet dreams trying to unsee THAT nightmare! *dramatically faints onto keyboard*