HTML: The "Programming Language" That Isn't

Ah, the classic "HTML is not a programming language" debate visualized as an Among Us parody. The joke's been around since the first developer tried to pad their resume with "HTML programming." Sure, you can write tags all day, but without a way to handle logic, loops, or variables, you're just marking up text with fancy brackets. It's like bringing a spoon to a knife fight and insisting you're still armed.

Ah, the sweet taste of accidental technical credibility. Nothing says "I'm a real developer" quite like having ChatGPT write HTML for you while someone peeks at your screen. The crying emoji is just chef's kiss perfect—that moment when you realize you've accidentally joined a club you have no qualifications for. Welcome to modern tech, where the line between "knowing what you're doing" and "knowing how to prompt an AI" gets blurrier by the day. The nonprofit coordinator is living the dream we're all secretly afraid of—being exposed as the impostors we feel like.

Oh. My. GOD! The expectations vs. reality of code audits is sending me to the GRAVE! 💀 Top panel: The pristine, politically-charged algorithm that Elon thinks he'll discover in Twitter's codebase - a smoking gun that automatically deletes Trump tweets and bans authors! Bottom panel: The absolute HORROR SHOW he'll actually find - a cursed "isEven" function with a switch statement that returns undefined for 0, false for 1, true for 2, and false for 3. With a desperate plea comment "Please don't look at this" from some poor dev who KNEW they committed crimes against humanity! The reality of tech acquisitions: you pay $44 billion only to discover the backend is held together with duct tape, prayers, and questionable logic that would make computer science professors weep uncontrollably!

Oh my gosh, this is the MOST ACCURATE THING EVER! 😂 That initial dopamine rush when you get a shiny new project idea - you're basically Tom from Tom & Jerry with arms raised in pure joy, ready to conquer the world! "THIS IS GONNA BE THE COOLEST APP EVER!!!" ...and then reality hits exactly 5 minutes after you start coding. Suddenly you're staring at your IDE like a shell-shocked cat, questioning all your life choices. "Wait, how do I even implement this? Why isn't this library working? WHAT IS THIS ERROR MESSAGE EVEN TRYING TO TELL ME?!" The eternal cycle of programmer enthusiasm vs. programmer despair. We never learn, do we? Yet we'll be excited about the next project idea tomorrow! 🙃

The inevitable hipster-ification of web development has arrived. Just like artisanal coffee shops charging $9 for "hand-poured" water, we'll soon have developers selling "organic, handwritten, non-AI websites" at premium prices. Next they'll be telling us their HTML is free-range and their CSS was harvested during a full moon. Can't wait for the "small-batch, locally-sourced JavaScript" trend to hit.

The confidence-to-disaster pipeline in action! Your code struts around like a superhero on localhost—flawless, magnificent, practically ready for a Nobel Prize in Computer Science. Then you deploy to production and suddenly it's an unrecognizable mess with the thousand-yard stare of someone who's seen things no code should ever see. Nothing humbles a developer faster than watching your "perfect" code crumble the moment it leaves the safety of your machine. It's like sending your child to their first day of school only to discover they've forgotten how to speak, walk, and breathe simultaneously.