When The New Dev Hasn't Met Reality Yet

Content Project Manager: We're going to build a facial-recognition application. Programmer: OK Project Manager: People will put in a photo, and it will search a database for matching faces. Programmer: OK Project Manager: And while it's doing that, it should flash up, on screen, a slide show featuring hundreds of other random faces which definitely aren't a match No that's stupid we're not doing that. Programmer:

Content USING DARK THEMED IDEs USING DARK THEMED OS MAKING DARK THEMED MEMES

Content APPLICATION FOR EMPLOYMENT I refer to the recent death of the Technical Manager at your Company and hereby apply for the reDiacement of the deceased vanader. Each time I apply for a job, I get a repiy that there's no vacancy but in this case I have caught you red- handed and vou have no excuse because I even attended the fancral to be sure that he was trul dead and buried before applying, Attached to my letter is a copy of my CV and his death Certificate.

Content Waterskiing SCUBA Diving Mountain Biking Rollerblading Computer Programming Tennis

Content 1664193684820.png, 325KiB, 512512 Anonymous Mon 26 Sep 2022 15:01:35 No. 174703216 174702313 damn it this reminded me of the guy who sparked the interest in technology in me when i was like 7-8 yo download some song.exe pc goes wild neighbour kid who is 8 years older than me comes home to fix it explains file formats to me next week ask him to come install prince of persia explains cracks and game installation a year later shows me how to setup a private WoW server shows me how bug exploiting works in private WoW servers helping me get geared up go to their house shows me some script that opens and closes the CD tray MINDISFUCKINGBLOWNAWAY.jpg gives me the address for his website im actually losing my shit now the site is mainlv nudes of some chicks and a bikini photo session of a local 910 hottie shows me how it works and explains some pho and html shit which sounded like black magic back then this is the day i became a coomer and decided ill be into programming. 20 years later im a java dev and archiving chaturbate streams en masse thank you, neighbouring coomer geek for pointing me in the right direction ProgrammerHumor io

The eternal promise of documentation vs. the crushing reality. You spend hours debugging some obscure error, finally surrender your ego and check the docs, only to find such helpful gems as "returns a value if successful" or my personal favorite: "this function does what it's supposed to do." Thanks for nothing. The only thing more useless than bad documentation is the mandatory team-building exercise where Dave from accounting tells us about his weekend kayaking trip.