Interns Too: The Great Code Massacre

The lifecycle of a "revolutionary startup idea" in Discord: from cold DM to complete meltdown in under 3 hours. Our hero Warm-Juggernaut8340 demonstrates the classic startup founder progression: blind ambition → claiming to be an engineer → insulting potential collaborators → calling them children. Meanwhile, True-Strike7696 just sits back and watches the entrepreneurial spirit implode with the patience of someone who's seen this movie before. The perfect psychological breakdown in five messages or less.

When your code doesn't work, the logical approach is to copy and paste it. When that fails, the truly sophisticated approach is to frantically copy the same thing multiple times before pasting it, as if the clipboard might suddenly decide to work better after the fifth Ctrl+C. The clipboard anxiety is real. Nothing says "I've completely lost control of my development process" quite like hammering Ctrl+C like you're trying to send an SOS in clipboard Morse code.

Content Time Use Date. now() to get the current date and time. Date.now()! By the way, you can set the time. Move the clocks back one hour Date.now() - 3600000! Important! Please remember to do this when the clocks change.

The truth bomb that launched a thousand uncomfortable laughs at a dev conference. Nothing says "modern web development" like creating 47MB of JavaScript dependencies to avoid writing display: flex; justify-content: center; . Meanwhile, the audience is divided between those nodding in agreement and those who just published their "Revolutionary CSS-in-JS Solution" on GitHub yesterday. The irony of someone presenting this while probably using a JS framework to power their slides is just *chef's kiss*.

When you try to optimize your life with computer science algorithms but reality hits different. Binary search requires your life to be sorted first—you know, organized, stable, having your stuff together. Spoiler alert: most of us are living in O(n²) chaos. The brutal honesty here is *chef's kiss*. You can't just slap efficient algorithms onto a messy existence and expect miracles. It's like trying to use a hash map when your keys are all undefined. The monkey's deadpan delivery of "your life isn't sorted" is the kind of existential debugging message nobody wants to see but everyone needs to hear. Pro tip: Before implementing any O(log n) life improvements, make sure to run a quick isSorted() check on your existence. Otherwise you're just gonna get undefined behavior and segfaults in your happiness.

Content You couldn't sleep for 2 days because you missed her I couldn't sleep for 5 days because I missed a "" in my code We are not the same