PHP: The Undying Language

Content "You can't just copy-pase pseudocode into a program and expect it to work" that's where you're wrong kiddo kython

Content X Back End Developer THRESHOLD United Kingdom (Remote) Job Description No recruiter . Female applicants are welcome. THRESHOLD it a B2B SaaS business helping crypto companies manae their diort al assets. We are scaling and looking for switched-on driven professionals who want to grow and help accelerate our growth. Your role will include: Identify suitable API data providers for a range of blockchains Integrate APIs to the existing backend system Design and implement improvements to the existing backend system Contribute readable, well tested, and well-documented code Requirements: Experience with Python (incl. Pandas) Experience with Database such as MySQL, PostgreSQL Experience with API integration Experience with Linux Fluency in English, another language is a bonus Strong skills in problem-solving, algorithm design and data structure desian Strong communication and teamwork skills. Good to have: Experience with public blockchains such as Bitcoin and Ethereum Experience with other backend technologies such as NodeJs, PHP, GO, Java Experience working on AWS Understanding of smart contracts Understanding of ETH layer 2

Content Question 1: What is my name? O Davis O Elon John Miguel Question 2: What is my quest? I seek the Holy Grail I seek world peace I seek to pass this lab I seek a cheeseburger Question 3: What is my favorite color? Green O Purple O Blue Orange Question 4: What is the velocity of an unladened swallow? 20 kmhr 25 kwhr 15 kmhr O African or European? What? I don't know that! O AAAAAAAAAAARGH O AARGH O AAAAAAAAR O AAAAA Submit Quiz

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Content Y Hacker News new threads past comments ask show jobs submit best 1. A "AI is dangerous", says CEO of Sigma Technologies (arxiv.org) 1678 points by Akronymus 5 days ago 874 comments 2. A Apple to invest 200 millions in PHP (techcrunch.com) 1371 points by topshelf 5 days ago 835 comments 3. A California bans Taco Tuesdays (forbes.com) 1229 points by etiam 4 days ago 470 comments 4. A Why I stopped using toilet paper (substack.com) 820 points by mfiguiere 4 days ago 729 comments 5. A Rust 4.3.2 released (rust-lang.org) 790 points by werner 3 days ago 157 comments 6. A Stop using compilers (medium.com) 750 points by dagurp 4 days ago 432 comments ProgrammerHumor.

Someone really woke up one day and thought "You know what the world needs? A Rust compiler written in PHP." Like, bestie, we're out here trying to ESCAPE PHP, not give it MORE power! The absolute audacity to write a RUST compiler—the language that's all about memory safety and blazing speed—in PHP of all things. It's like building a Ferrari engine out of cardboard and duct tape. The fact that it has 2 stars and 0 forks is sending me into orbit because even GitHub is like "nah fam, we're good." The universe is screaming for this not to exist, yet here we are. Someone literally said "I'm gonna make Rust slower" and committed to the bit. The chaotic energy is unmatched and I'm equally horrified and impressed.