SQL Clause Is Coming To Town

This is what happens when you outsource your IT department to the lowest bidder. The classic "we're working VERY HARD on your issue" while the tech team is literally just kittens playing inside your computer. No wonder your ticket has been "in progress" for three weeks! Those adorable little troubleshooters are probably chewing on your RAM while management assures you they've got their "best people" on it. Next time your computer crashes, just check if it's a hairball in the CPU fan rather than a memory leak.

Oh sweet summer child... In the tech world, WAP means Wireless Access Point. In the other world, well... let's just say Cardi B wasn't rapping about network infrastructure. That awkward moment when you realize the HR ladies weren't correcting your technical knowledge—they were saving you from yourself. Nothing like discovering you've been enthusiastically discussing something completely different in all those meetings. Bet those quarterly reports read differently now!

That awkward moment when IT forgets to revoke your Slack access after firing you, and now you're lurking in the shadows like Goku plotting his revenge. Time to watch your ex-coworkers panic when you drop the "I can see all your messages about the production server being down" bomb. Nothing says professional closure like witnessing your replacement struggle with the codebase you deliberately left undocumented. Digital ghost mode: ACTIVATED .

The secret to web developer wealth revealed: sending a "Request" and getting paid for a "Reponse" (yes, with that magnificent typo). This is basically the world's simplest business model - ask server for money, server gives money back. If only it were that easy! The real irony is that most webdev boyfriends are actually sending thousands of requests just to get a response that says "404: Money Not Found." The relationship between client and server is the only stable relationship in their lives.

The human nervous system - nature's original spaghetti code. Someone's looking at this anatomical nightmare and their first IT instinct is "just unplug everything and start over." Spoken like someone who's spent too many hours under a desk untangling Ethernet cables. The real horror isn't the skeleton - it's imagining having to document each connection before the teardown.

Remember that blissful era when your worth wasn't measured by how many connections you had on LinkedIn? THOSE WERE THE DAYS! 💫 Just sitting in a metaphorical field of flowers, completely unaware that someday you'd be crafting the PERFECT profile summary while stalking potential employers at 3 AM! The sheer AUDACITY of existing without knowing what "leveraging your network" meant! Now we're all just digital peacocks, frantically adding skills we barely have and connecting with people we'd cross the street to avoid. GIVE ME BACK MY FLOWER FIELD, YOU CORPORATE MONSTERS! 😭