Mobile development Memes

Posts tagged with Mobile development

Write Once, Debug Everywhere

Write Once, Debug Everywhere
The dream: "I'll use Flutter and write my app once for all platforms!" The reality: You end up writing it twice anyway because something always breaks on either Android or iOS. The bell curve shows that the average developers (the 68% in the middle) smugly believe cross-platform tools save time, while both the complete novices and the battle-scarred experts (the 0.1% on both ends) know the painful truth. Cross-platform frameworks are basically the tech equivalent of those "one size fits all" clothing items that somehow manage to fit nobody correctly.

Identity Crisis: SQLite As JSON Storage

Identity Crisis: SQLite As JSON Storage
SQLite having an existential crisis is the most relatable thing ever. Poor little database engine just trying to find its purpose in life, only to discover it's being used as a glorified JSON storage container. That's like hiring a professional chef to make toast. Mobile devs are out here committing database sacrilege - taking a fully-featured relational database with ACID compliance and proper SQL support and just stuffing unstructured JSON blobs into it. The robot's "OH my god" reaction is every database administrator's soul leaving their body when they see SQL queries that could've been replaced with a simple text file.

Alright Who Was It

Alright Who Was It
Oh my god, which developer forgot to remove their code comments from the production build?! ๐Ÿ˜‚ Someone literally pushed the entire explanation of what the notification is supposed to do... IN THE ACTUAL NOTIFICATION ! That poor soul is probably hiding under their desk right now while the senior devs are hunting them down. This is what happens when you code at 3 AM fueled by nothing but energy drinks and desperation! The best part is they even commented the comment! It's like comment-ception!