Folding Phones: The Web Developer's New Nightmare

Ah yes, the good old Weimar Republic approach to RAM pricing. At the rate we're going, you'll need a wheelbarrow full of cash just to afford 32GB of DDR6. Chrome alone will probably require 64GB minimum by then, and that's just for keeping two tabs open. The hardware manufacturers have figured out the perfect business model: make software bloat faster than Moore's Law can keep up, then charge exponentially more for the privilege of running Electron apps that could've been websites. Your wallet is already crying and 2026 hasn't even arrived yet.

The juxtaposition here is pure gold. After years of developers begging for dark mode on Stack Overflow, they finally release it in 2020... proving that yes, programmers literally only want one thing. And apparently it's "fucking disgusting" to want your retinas intact at 3 AM while desperately searching for why your code is broken. Sure took them long enough – we only had to wait until our eyeballs were practically fossilized from light mode strain. The sweet irony of Stack Overflow calling their most requested feature "coming to life" when it's actually saving the life of our poor, abused eyes.

Behold the rare sighting of a backend developer attempting to write CSS! Nothing says "I'm out of my comfort zone" quite like physically pointing at the screen as if the styles might respond to intimidation tactics. This is the equivalent of a fish trying to climb a tree – technically possible, but painful to watch. The backend dev probably spent 3 hours just trying to center a div, only to give up and mutter something about "this is why we have frontend specialists" before crawling back to the safety of their database queries and API endpoints.

Oh, the dystopian future we've been promised! By 2030, developers won't just be battling merge conflicts and dependency hell—they'll be sitting through UNSKIPPABLE advertisements just to install a package. Imagine needing to urgently fix a production bug at 3 AM, running npm install , and then being forced to watch a 30-second ad about cloud services you can't afford while your app burns in the background. The soul-crushing exhaustion on this character's face? That's the look of someone who's already watched 9 ads and is contemplating whether switching to Yarn or pnpm would spare them this torture. Spoiler alert: it won't. The ad overlords are coming for ALL package managers. Welcome to the monetized hellscape where even your dependencies come with commercial breaks!

Someone asked what programming languages polyglots dream in, and the answer "JavaScript" got absolutely demolished with the most savage correction of all time. Because let's be real, nobody is out here having sweet dreams about type coercion, undefined is not a function, and the fact that [] + {} somehow equals "[object Object]" while {} + [] equals 0. JavaScript doesn't visit your dreams—it breaks into your subconscious at ungodly hours, whispers "NaN === NaN is false" in your ear, and leaves you questioning your entire existence. The language where adding an array to an object makes perfect sense to absolutely nobody, but here we are, building the entire internet with it anyway. Sweet dreams are made of these? More like cold sweats and existential dread.

OH. MY. GOD. The absolute MELTDOWN happening here is what I live for! 💅 This poor soul is having an existential crisis because people keep saying "Golang" instead of just "Go" and I am LIVING for this level of rage! The tea is SCALDING hot: Go was named "Go" - short, sweet, impossible to Google. But nooooo, people had to start calling it "Golang" because otherwise you'd be searching for a VERB instead of a programming language. The AUDACITY! And now this person is threatening to rename everything! "Rustlang"! "TypeScriptyMcTypeFace.io"! The DRAMA! The THEATRICS! All because some developers can't stick to the official two-letter name that's basically unsearchable online! I'm framing this rant and hanging it on my wall. Peak developer frustration caught in the wild! *chef's kiss*