Language design Memes

Posts tagged with Language design

C Plus Plus: The Final Boss Of Syntax Nightmares
C++ Programming Debugging
8 days ago 77.8K views 0 shares
C Plus Plus: The Final Boss Of Syntax Nightmares
Ah yes, entering an ugly syntax competition with C++ is like bringing a knife to a nuclear war. The language that gave us std::vector<std::map<std::string, std::shared_ptr<AbstractFactoryImpl>>>::const_iterator has been traumatizing developers since 1985. It's the language equivalent of that friend who says "hold my beer" before doing something spectacularly dangerous. Template metaprogramming alone should qualify as a war crime under the Geneva Convention.

The Worst Of Both Worlds
Java Programming Python
8 days ago 84.2K views 0 shares
The Worst Of Both Worlds
Ah, Jython – where Java's verbosity meets Python's dynamic typing in an unholy matrimony. It's like getting the worst Christmas presents from both sides of the family. You want Python's elegance? Sorry, here's some Java boilerplate. Craving Java's strong typing? Nope, enjoy those runtime errors instead! It's the programming equivalent of putting ketchup on your ice cream because someone convinced you it combines the best of both worlds. Spoiler alert: it doesn't.

The World If Array Lengths Were Civilized
C++ Javascript Programming
9 days ago 79.4K views 0 shares
The World If Array Lengths Were Civilized
Ah, the eternal C/C++ programmer's dream - a world where you don't have to choose between sizeof(array) and sizeof(array[0]) just to get the damn array length. Meanwhile, JavaScript devs are smugly using .length while we're over here doing division like it's 1972. The utopian future depicted isn't flying cars - it's sensible array APIs that don't decay into pointers the moment you sneeze on them. Ten thousand years of programming evolution and we're still manually calculating element counts like cavemen with abacuses.

Let's Create A Programming Nightmare
Programming C++ Javascript php Python
22 days ago 110.0K views 0 shares
Let's Create A Programming Nightmare
The programming community's favorite pastime: creating yet another language nobody asked for! Imagine taking JavaScript's type coercion, PHP's inconsistent naming conventions, C++'s memory management, Python's GIL, and Java's verbosity—then mashing them into one horrific Frankenstein's monster of a language. The compiler would generate 200 warnings just to print "Hello World" and the documentation would be written exclusively in regex. The only thing more terrifying than using this language would be explaining it during a job interview.

Fuck_Around/Find_Out: C# For The TikTok Generation
Csharp Gamedev Microsoft Programming
24 days ago 60.7K views 0 shares
Fuck_Around/Find_Out: C# For The TikTok Generation
The ultimate Gen Z programming language update we never knew we needed! On the left, we have boring old C# with its stuffy keywords like "public", "private", and "try/catch". But on the right? Pure linguistic chaos that would make any teenager instantly become a 10x developer. Instead of "public float", we get "highkey period" and "private bool" transforms into "lowkey fax" – because nothing says serious software engineering like replacing Boolean logic with slang authenticity checks. My personal favorite has to be replacing exception handling with "find_out(Tea t)" and "Shoutout.SpillTea(t.Yap)" – because why log an error when you can just spill the tea on your coding disasters? Microsoft's next brilliant strategy: making programming languages that double as TikTok comment sections. Debugging would be absolutely unhinged.

Golang Date Format: The Executive Order
Golang Programming Backend
27 days ago 85.2K views 0 shares
Golang Date Format: The Executive Order
Ah, Golang's date formatting—the language where someone thought, "You know what developers need? More cognitive load!" Instead of using sensible formats like everyone else, Go decided that the reference date January 2, 2006 at 3:04:05 PM MST (01/02 03:04:05PM '06 -0700) would be their magic template. Want to format a date? Just remember which parts of this specific moment in time to use! It's like having to recite a magic incantation every time you need to print a simple timestamp. Seven years into using Go and I still have to Google this nonsense every single time.

Please Agree On One Name
Programming Golang C++ Typescript Javascript
1 month ago 152.9K views 1 shares
Please Agree On One Name
Ah, the eternal civil war among programmers trying to get the size of something. Is it count() ? size() ? length ? sizeof() ? len() ? Every damn language and library decided to pick their own favorite, and now we're all just Spider-Men pointing at each other in confusion. Nothing says "I'm a seasoned developer" like muscle memory making you type the wrong size function in every language and then cursing under your breath when the IDE throws a red squiggly line. Consistency? In programming? That's a good joke!