Just Use Curl

Nothing converts an atheist faster than trying to install Arch Linux. One minute you're confidently typing commands, the next you're on your knees begging any cosmic entity that might exist to save your terminal from descending into dependency hell. For the uninitiated, Arch Linux is basically the CrossFit of operating systems - its users never shut up about it, and installation requires the perfect combination of technical skill, patience, and blind faith that something will eventually work. When that cryptic error message appears after your 47th attempt at configuring your bootloader, even Richard Dawkins would start lighting candles and making sacrifices to the command line gods.

Oh look, another Bash victim! While "riding a bike" sticks with you forever, Bash scripting is that special hell where your muscle memory means absolutely nothing. You'll spend 20 minutes Googling how to write a basic for loop for the 500th time, wondering why the syntax looks like it was designed by someone smashing random keys. And don't get me started on those cryptic one-liners that work perfectly until you add a space somewhere and suddenly your script is formatting your hard drive. It's the programming equivalent of assembling IKEA furniture with instructions written in hieroglyphics... while blindfolded.

OH. MY. GOD. The most SAVAGE attack on Linux developers ever created! 💀 This is basically every Linux developer's nightmare - trapped in a horror movie where the villain isn't asking you to cut off your foot, but to USE SOMETHING THAT ALREADY WORKS PERFECTLY FINE without spending 47 hours customizing it first! The door is unlocked? THE HORROR! A perfectly good wheel that doesn't need to be rebuilt from scratch using your own custom-compiled materials?! MAKE IT STOP! How can any self-respecting Linux dev possibly walk away without rewriting the entire wheel in Rust first?!

Ah, the classic terminal persecution complex! Nothing says "I'm just trying to check my disk space" like opening a black screen with colorful text in public and suddenly becoming the neighborhood cyber-terrorist. The moment you fire up that bash prompt, everyone within eyesight transforms into a medieval mob ready to burn the witch. You could literally be typing ls -la to check your files, but Karen from accounting is already dialing the FBI because she's convinced you're hacking the Pentagon. Hollywood has a lot to answer for. Twenty years of hackers portrayed as hoodie-wearing villains typing at lightning speed on green-on-black screens has turned us all into suspects. Meanwhile, the real cybercriminals are probably using slick GUIs with beautiful dashboards.

Oh honey, you thought your ChatGPT coding skills were impressive? That's ADORABLE! 💅 Meanwhile, the Linux user just casually whips out a BAZOOKA in this tech standoff! It's like bringing a plastic spoon to a nuclear war! The absolute AUDACITY of showing up with AI-generated code when someone else has been compiling kernels since before breakfast! The Linux user is just standing there like "You wanna see REAL power? I wrote my own device drivers FOR FUN this morning." I'm DYING! 😂

The eternal text editor war claims another victim! Nano is often the gateway drug for command-line editing—deceptively simple with those helpful shortcuts at the bottom. But then comes Vim, with its modal editing paradigm that warps your brain faster than a quantum compiler. The sheer terror in that final panel perfectly captures the moment you realize you've typed vim and now have absolutely no idea how to exit. Not even Thanos with the infinity gauntlet can escape the clutches of Vim without frantically Googling "how to exit vim" for the 42nd time.