Privacy Theater At Its Finest

Content How to fix any computer The Oatmeal http:theoatmeal.com Windows Step I. Reboot Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step 2 Step a. Format hard drive. Reinstall Windows. Lose all your files. Quietly weep. Apple Step I. Take it to an Apple store. Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a Step 2. Buy a new Mac. Overdraw your account. Quietly weep. Linux Step 1. Learn to code in Ct. Recompile the kernel. Build your own microprocessor out of spare silicon you had lying around. Recompile the kernel again. Switch distros. Recompile the kernel again but this time using a CPU powered by refracted light from Saturn. Grow a gant beard. Blame Sun Microsystems. Turn your bedroom into a server closet and spend ten years falling asleep to the sound of whirring fans. Switch distros again. Abandon all hygiene. Write a regular expression that would make other programmers cry blood. Learn to code in Java Recompile the kernel again (but this time while wearing your lucky socks) Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a n Step a. Revert back to using Windows or a Mac Quietly weep.

Content STOP ADDING FEATURES TO WEB BROWSERS AND JAVASCRIPT Chrome is not supposed to be able to run feature-complete Photoshop Hundreds of implemented TC-39 proposals, yet no real-world use found for running CRust applications inside of a browser window Wanted to run a program written in javascript with filesystem access for fun anyways? We had a tool for that, it's called NodeJS. "Yes please, give me Array.at (-1) and private class members", "Please give me finer manual memory allocation in WASM" - Statements dreamed up by the utterly deranged. Look at what Web Developers have been demanding your respect for, all this time, with all the API's we built for them: .???? ???? 222 debugging c code inside of the devtools running neural networks on the client side rendering shaders with WebGPUGL Hello, i would like JI('0) 1(' )!!I apples please They have played us for absolute fools

Content How Apple builds OSX Security: How Developers use OSX Security: "This application is asking for Admin privileges" Give them

The ultimate tech bro paradox: dropping $3000+ on a MacBook Pro with specs that could launch a satellite and $1500 on an ergonomic throne that looks like it was designed by aliens... only to pair it with the same three faded startup t-shirts that have seen more coffee spills than code reviews. It's like installing a Ferrari engine in your car but refusing to change your underwear. The cognitive dissonance is so powerful it could be harnessed as an alternative energy source.

Content How to fix any computer Windows Step 1. Reboot Did that fix it? Nor Proceed to step a Step a Format hard drive. Reinstall Windows Lose all your files Quietly weep Apple Step 1. Take it to an Apple store Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a Step a Buy a new Mac Overdraw your account Quietly weep Linux Step 1. Learn to code in C. Recompile the kernel. Build your own microprocessor out of spare silicon you had lying around Recompile the kernel again. Switch distros. Recompile the kernel again but this time using a CPU powered by refracted light from Saturn. Grow a giant beard. Blame Sun Microsystems. Turn your bedroom into a server closet and spend ten years falling asleep to the sound of whirring fans. Switch distros again. Abandon all hygiene. Write a regular expression that would make other programmers cry blood. Learn to code in Java. Recompile the kernel again (but this time while wearing your lucky socks). Did that fix it? No? Proceed to step a Step a. Revert back to Using Windows or a Mac Quietly weep

Content O is apple a software or hardware company News Videos Books Images Shopping Ma Apple is a software company - Apple has always been a software company. The first Apple computer would have been nothing without the software to run on it. Mar 4, 2019 G7 Computerworld Apple in 2019: It's all about the software, stupid - Computerworld Apple is a hardware company that develops an operating system and services to ... I Hacker News. Y Y Combinator Apple is a hardware company that develops an operating system and ... ProgrammerHumor