Pick Your Battles

HONEY, ANOTHER TECH BRO THINKS HIS AI STARTUP IS REVOLUTIONARY! 🙄 The top panel shows some delusional founder with that manic "I just discovered ChatGPT" gleam in his eyes, screaming about disrupting the entire industry. Meanwhile, the actual industry (represented by endless shelves of identical products) is just sitting there like "Sure, Jan." The industry has heard this EXACT same pitch 47,000 times this week alone and is completely unfazed by your "groundbreaking" idea that's basically just GPT with a fancy logo slapped on it. REVOLUTIONARY INDEED! *dramatically faints onto keyboard*

Nothing like the sweet smell of career arbitrage in the morning. Just slap "AI" on your LinkedIn profile and watch your market value triple while recruiters trip over themselves to throw gold bars at you. Meanwhile, you're still running the same SQL queries and data pipelines you were last week, but now you're an "AI visionary" commanding a small fortune. The industry's collective amnesia about what skills actually matter is the gift that keeps on giving. Capitalism at its finest, folks.

OpenAI out here offering half a million dollars for someone to literally just stand next to the servers with their hand hovering over the power button like some kind of apocalypse bouncer. The job requirements? Be patient, know how to unplug things, and maybe throw water on the servers if GPT decides to go full Skynet. They're not even hiding it anymore – they're basically saying "yeah we're terrified our AI might wake up and choose violence, so we need someone on standby to pull the plug before it starts a robot uprising." The bonus points for water bucket proficiency really seals the deal. Nothing says "cutting-edge AI research" quite like having a dedicated human fire extinguisher making bank to potentially save humanity by unplugging a computer. The best part? You have to be EXCITED about their approach to research while simultaneously preparing to murder their life's work. Talk about mixed signals.

That moment when management says "Let the new intern refactor our 15-year-old codebase using the latest AI tools!" and suddenly your monolithic spaghetti monster is being "optimized" by ChatGPT. The intern's smirking because they have no idea what horrors lurk in those 200,000 lines of uncommented code with business logic from three CEOs ago. Meanwhile, senior devs are quietly updating their resumes while watching the dumpster fire unfold. Pro tip: Always keep a backup before letting someone with AI confidence and zero legacy context near your production code.

The glorious fall of programmer dignity, visualized in perfect clarity. Once upon a time, developers were digital demigods who wrote code without AI crutches, built entire games in Assembly (because apparently suffering builds character), crafted code that literally sent humans to the moon, and performed memory management wizardry by hand. Fast forward to today's pathetic reality: developers frantically Googling how to center a div (still an unsolved mystery of computer science), begging ChatGPT to fix basic syntax errors, getting permanently trapped in Vim like it's some kind of developer Hotel California, and introducing three new bugs while fixing one—a net negative contribution to humanity. The evolution from muscle-bound coding titans to helpless brain-worms perfectly captures how we've traded actual knowledge for dependency on tools. Progress!

Forget complex algorithms! This Python developer decided to outsource the "is odd number" check to ChatGPT. Just casually burning through API credits to determine if a number has a remainder when divided by 2. The function makes a full API call, parses the response, and checks if the answer contains "yes" - all to replace a simple return number % 2 != 0 . Peak computational efficiency! 💸