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So you're having doubts about your coding career? Don't worry, the tech industry has prepared some lovely exit routes for you. Product management is the "I still want to be in tech but without the actual coding" path. Teacher is for those who think "if I can't do it, I'll teach it" (and honestly, respect). DevRel is basically getting paid to tweet and go to conferences while pretending you still code. And then there's goose farming – the most honest option here, because at least geese are upfront about being annoying and difficult to work with, unlike your CI/CD pipeline. The real kicker? Half the senior devs you know have already mentally chosen their path. They're just waiting for the right moment or the next production incident to pull the trigger.

The ultimate self-service experience. Nothing quite like the pride of a tester who discovers they can fix their own bugs instead of filing a ticket and waiting six sprints for someone to look at it. That dog walking itself is basically QA saying "Fine, I'll do it myself" after the third time a dev responded with "works on my machine." The circle of software development life.

The Project Manager is literally taking bullets for the team while developers peacefully sleep through the chaos. That brave PM is intercepting all those client complaints and feature requests with their own body, getting absolutely shredded in the process. Meanwhile, devs are in blissful REM sleep, completely unaware that their inbox would be a war zone without that human shield in green camo. The PM doesn't even get hazard pay for this level of client-facing carnage!

That moment when your "just for fun" code suddenly becomes mission-critical! One day you're tinkering with a side project to sharpen your skills, and the next day some executive is presenting it in the quarterly roadmap. The facial expression says it all - the perfect mix of pride, terror, and "what have I gotten myself into?" Now you're frantically refactoring spaghetti code, adding proper error handling, and praying that your commented-out debug statements don't make it to production. Classic case of success-induced panic!

The duality of a developer's existence captured in two frames! Top panel: You're the unstoppable Hulk, smashing through problems with brute force hacks and questionable solutions. Who cares about best practices when your spaghetti code actually runs? Bottom panel: The crushing reality of code review hits. Suddenly you're the embarrassed Hulk, face-palming as your colleagues discover your 17 nested if-statements, magic numbers, and that comment that says "// TODO: fix this horrible hack before anyone sees it." The ONE WAY sign in the background is the perfect metaphor - there's only one direction after code review: refactoring hell.

Ah, the mythical "quick recruitment process" – right up there with unicorns and bug-free code. That endless Snake Way from Dragon Ball Z perfectly captures the soul-crushing journey of tech hiring. "Just two more interviews" they say, as you complete your 7th technical assessment and prepare for your 12th "culture fit" call. Meanwhile, your IDE gathers dust and three JavaScript frameworks have already gone obsolete. The real superpower isn't flying or energy blasts – it's maintaining your sanity while HR keeps "circling back" with "updates" that somehow extend the timeline by another month.