Watching someone print out code for review is like witnessing a crime against modern development practices. In 2023? SERIOUSLY? That's 30+ pages of perfectly good trees sacrificed to the debugging gods when we have perfectly good monitors, version control, and code review tools. The confused Tom face perfectly captures that moment of "Did I just time travel back to 1995?" Nothing says "I don't trust Git" like killing forests to manually track changes with a red pen. Bonus horror: imagine them printing JavaScript with all those nested callbacks and dependencies!

Medieval tech bros would've been insufferable. "Just discovered this revolutionary 10x scaling solution called 'printing' that eliminates manual copying. Disrupting the entire monk industry! 🚀 First adopters will dominate since 95% of the target market is illiterate anyway. Classic network effect play. The painful irony is that today's tech influencers haven't evolved much from their 1450s counterparts - still hyping up obvious innovations with manufactured urgency while completely missing their own anachronisms. "We are SO early" has been the battle cry of overconfident tech evangelists for nearly 600 years.

Ah, the classic Japanese Yen hack! Some poor soul wrote a currency conversion function that divides the exchange rate by 100 only for JPY. Why? Because the Japanese Yen doesn't use decimal points (1 USD ≈ 150 JPY), so someone "fixed" it by dividing by 100... which is completely wrong and will utterly destroy your financial calculations. But hey, that one time when the exchange rate is exactly 100, the code will accidentally work! Just like that broken clock... right twice a day.

The programming world's most savage skincare routine! Just like those miracle products that promise to fix all your facial imperfections, developers keep trying to convince themselves that Vibe-driven development has legitimate enterprise use cases. Spoiler alert: it doesn't. For the uninitiated, "Vibe-driven development" is that magical methodology where decisions are made based on feelings rather than data or best practices. "This framework just feels right" or "I'm getting good energy from this architecture" – pure nonsense that somehow infiltrated professional settings. The harsh truth? Vibe-based code belongs exclusively in the realm of personal projects where the only stakeholder is you and your questionable decision-making skills. Enterprise solutions built on vibes are about as reliable as a skincare routine based on wishful thinking.

That moment when you're faced with the eternal developer dilemma: spend an entire day making the codebase better or just slap together some hacky solution that'll come back to haunt you in six months. The hand reaching for that "minimum effort hack" button is all of us at 4:55pm on a Friday. Sure, you could refactor everything properly, but then your PR would be 2000 files and nobody wants to review that monstrosity anyway. Technical debt? That's a problem for Future You. And Future You hates Current You for a reason.

The left side shows the beefy, muscular Doge representing Fortran—the ancient powerhouse of scientific computing—flexing its numerical computation muscles. Meanwhile, the weak Doge on the right is begging for mercy from string manipulation tasks, which Fortran handles about as gracefully as a physicist at a poetry slam. This is basically every scientific programmer from the 60s who chose Fortran for its blazing fast number crunching, then spent the next decade crying whenever they needed to process text. The language was literally designed by people who thought "who needs words when you have EQUATIONS?"