I Work Harder Not Smarter

Content Python: What if everything was a dict? Java: What if everything was an object? JavaScript: What if everything was a dict and an object? C: What if everything was a pointer? APL: What if everything was an array? Tel: What if everything was a string? Prolog: What if everything was a term? LISP: What if everything was a pair? Scheme: What if everything was a function? Haskell: What if everything was a monad? Assembly: What if everything was a register? Cog: What if everything was a typeproposition? COBOL: WHAT IF EVERYTHING WAS UPPERCASE? C: What if everything was like Java, but different? Ruby: What if everything was monkey patched? Pascal: BEGIN What if everything was structured? END C: What if we added everything to the language? C11: What if we forgot to stop adding stuff? Rust: What if garbage collection didn't exist? Go: What if we tried designing C a second time? Perl: What if shell, sed, and awk were one language? Peri6: What if we took the joke too far? PHP: What if we wanted to make SQL injection easier? VB: What if we wanted to allow anyone to program? VB.NET: What if we wanted to stop them again? Forth: What if everything was a stack? ColorForth: What if the stack was green? PostScript: What if everything was printed at 600dpi? XSLT: What if everything was an XML element? Make: What if everything was a dependency? m4: What if everything was incomprehensibly quoted? Scala: What if Haskell ran on the JVM? Clojure: What if LISP ran on the JVM? Lua: What if game developers got tired of C? Mathematica: What if Stephen Wolfram invented everything? Malbolge: What if there is no god? nixcraft

Content You: - fairly average software dev - claims not to be competitive, but secretly dreams of landing on the leaderboard at least once - uses a full IDE; wastes a minute right out the gate waiting for it to start - still parsing the problem statement while others are already submitting answers - actually uses a debugger when things aren't working Your competition: "Hackerman" - InfoSec major - sits at his PC on a near- lethal dose of Adderall waiting for the timer to hit 00:00 - has automated scripts for pulling the input and submitting solutions, and his own library of helper functions for every imaginable problem class - knows your IP at all times "-mhtwalters" - research scientist at Intel - does puzzles for fun that are harder than any job you will ever have - so utterly bored with the problems that he creates increasingly ridiculous self-imposed restrictions to keep things interesting - solved last year exclusively in APL on a System360 emulator, and still finished 9th on the global leaderboard - personal homepage is HTML 2.0 compliant "wihbr" - software dev from undisclosed Eastern- European country, making 200kyr for a company you've never heard of - is in literally every coding competition - Twitch stream is just a Vim terminal and the sounds of a mechanical keyboard - types faster than you can read or think "Tharg" - Linux kernel hacker - specialization in compiler design - is golfing in some esoteric language nobody has ever heard of - can mentally transpile any code he sees to assembly - measures his solutions' performance in actual clock cycles - overworked Chinese university student, double majoring in theoretical physics and chemical engineering - has been locked into various educational institutions since he was 3 years old - only time outside of school is for piano lessons - can literally only see the relevant parts of the problem statement - you will not understand his solutions without a PhD in discrete mathematics "Samir Nagheenanajar" - outsourced IT support technician - does puzzles because he has nothing better to do during his shift - forced to solve in Excel because he isn't allowed to install other software - can reveal the face of God using only BA - rumored to possess the combined knowledge and power of all Indian educational YouTubers

Content JavaScript, for all you Web Developers Python, for all you Data Scientists C, for all you Old Schoolers Java, for all you Masochists C, for all you Microsofters Go, for all you Kool Kidz r

Content Online Courses bus: 0.965 What they promise you will learn car traffic light: 0.887 per car: 0.987 car: 0.911 traffic light : 0.866 bus : 0.80 erson 0 807 lerson person: 12 Data Linear Regression 10 What you actually earn 6 4 - 2.

Content STOP POSTING CODE PROGRAMS WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE COMPILED FROM SOURCE YEARS OF PYTHON yet NO REAL-WORLD USE FOUND for .PY FILES Wanted to see the source anyway for a laugh? We had a tool for it: It was called "DECOMPILATION" "Yes please let me install the whole PYTHON to my PC just so I can RUN THIS PROGRAM" - statements dreamed up by the utterly deranged LOOK at what GitHub users have been demanding your Respect for all this time, with all the IDEs built for them (This is REAL Code, done by REAL Python programmers) tests initpy mainpy certifi2019.6.16 colonamass0.4.1 Pysocks1.7.0 requests2.22.0 requests-futures1.0.0 stem1.8.0 torrequest0.1.0 pandas1.0.0 openpyx13.0.10 exrex0.11.0 import sys if name " main ". Check if the user is pythonversion sys. vi ????? ??????? ??????????????????' THEY HAVE PLAYED US FOR ABSOLUTE FOOLS

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