The Real Programming Curriculum

Content When I wrote this code, only God I understood what it did. ASUS Now... only God knows.

Content Passed all 4 interview rounds DECLINES OFFER SLEEK'N'TEARS

The ethical choice is clear: skip all those pesky staging environments and test suites, and just YOLO your code straight to production. Why torture innocent lab animals with rigorous testing when you can torture your users instead? The bunny gets to live, the servers get to burn, and your on-call rotation gets to experience true character development at 2 AM on a Saturday. It's a win-win-win situation where everyone loses except the rabbit. The badge format perfectly mimics those "cruelty-free" product certifications, except instead of promising no harm to animals, it promises maximum harm to your infrastructure. The flames engulfing the server stack are a nice touch—really captures that warm, cozy feeling you get when your deployment takes down the entire platform and the Slack notifications start rolling in faster than you can silence them.

Content If money is lost, Nothing is lost. If health is lost, Something is lost. But if character is lost 8 Bits are lost.

Content I'll remember what this code does after all, I wrote it myself and it's unlikely anyone else will work on it I don't need to leave comments.

Content Figure out your code Spend an hour solving a nonexistent error created by the way you're testing the code Write it neatly down Spend an hour solving a nonexistent error created by the way you're testing the code