The Family Tech Support Lifeline

Ah yes, the classic family tech support paradox. Tell your relatives you work with computers and suddenly you're expected to resurrect their 12-year-old printer that's been possessed by demons since Windows Vista. The real million-dollar question isn't which coding title sounds fanciest on LinkedIn – it's which one will make your aunt stop asking you to fix her router during Thanksgiving dinner. Spoiler alert: none of them work. You could select "Quantum Entanglement Specialist" and they'd still hand you their phone saying "it's doing that thing again."