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The eternal zombie apocalypse of PHP development in one perfect timeline! From 1995's "PHP is dead, use ColdFusion!" to 2002's ASP.NET hype train, through Ruby on Rails and Django eras, all the way to 2018's NextJS revolution... yet somehow PHP keeps shambling along despite three decades of obituaries.
It's the cockroach of programming languages—surviving nuclear winters, framework fads, and endless "X is the PHP killer" declarations. By 2025, we'll all be attending its 30th birthday party while secretly writing
The real joke? Half the internet still runs on it. Complicated love indeed.
