Workflow Memes

Posts tagged with Workflow

When You Push Without Add

When You Push Without Add
The Git workflow massacre in three acts: First, we see a majestic Airbus A350 on the runway - that's git commit , your changes safely packaged and ready. Next, the plane gloriously takes flight - git push sending your code to the remote repository. But wait! The punchline: git add is just people climbing stairs to nowhere. Because if you push without adding files first, you're essentially sending an empty plane. Nothing gets deployed except your career prospects. It's the classic "why isn't my code in production?" moment right before the horrifying realization that you've been committing and pushing literal nothingness for the past hour.

Trust Issues: A Developer's Relationship With Clipboard

Trust Issues: A Developer's Relationship With Clipboard
The evolution of a developer's paranoia in three stages: Peasant tier: Using the mouse to highlight, right-click, and select copy/paste like some kind of digital caveman. Intermediate tier: Ctrl+C and Ctrl+V keyboard shortcuts. Efficient. Respectable. Enlightened tier: Ctrl+C pressed five times followed by Ctrl+V because the clipboard has betrayed you too many times before. Trust nothing. Verify everything. The real senior developers don't even trust their own keyboard inputs anymore. Not after... the incident .

Looks Good To Me... I Think?

Looks Good To Me... I Think?
Ah, the ancient hieroglyphics of code written before the holiday break. You stare at it like an archaeologist trying to decipher a dead language. "Who wrote this?" you wonder, before checking git blame and realizing it was you... three weeks ago. The coffee isn't strong enough for this level of amnesia. Your brain has completely purged all context about what the hell you were thinking when you wrote that nested ternary operator. Just approve it and type "LGTM" (Looks Good To Me), because honestly, who even remembers how this codebase works anymore?

The OS Intelligence Horseshoe Theory

The OS Intelligence Horseshoe Theory
The great OS debate, visualized as an IQ bell curve. On the left side, we've got the "I need Linux for programming" crowd—the beginners who think installing Ubuntu makes them elite hackers. In the middle, at the peak of intelligence, are the pragmatists who just want an OS that helps them ship code without fighting their tools. Then on the right, we loop back to "I need Linux for programming" again—but this time it's the bearded terminal wizards who've customized their Arch install to the point where only they can use it. After 15 years in this industry, I've learned the hard truth: the best OS is whichever one lets you focus on solving actual problems instead of configuring your damn package manager. But we'll all keep having this fight until the heat death of the universe anyway.

Code Change Vs Database Change

Code Change Vs Database Change
Behold! The most accurate depiction of development reality ever drawn by human hands! On the left, your code change workflow - majestic, detailed, robust like a thoroughbred horse ready for battle. And then there's your database change workflow - a pathetic stick figure abomination that looks like it was drawn by a caffeinated toddler with a crayon. We spend YEARS perfecting our code deployment pipelines with tests, CI/CD, and version control while our database migrations are basically "run this SQL and pray to the data gods it doesn't destroy production." The AUDACITY of us calling ourselves professionals while treating our precious data like this! 💀

Master Of Scrum

Master Of Scrum
Nothing strikes fear into the hearts of developers like an angry baby hippo representing your Scrum Master when you show up to standup with outdated Jira tickets. That tiny mouth can unleash a torrent of passive-aggressive phrases like "Is your ticket in the right column?" and "Can we get an estimate on that?" The daily ritual of frantically updating tickets 2 minutes before standup is the true agile methodology nobody talks about. Pro tip: keep a browser tab with Jira open at all times – not for productivity, but for survival.

Getting In The Way

Getting In The Way
The eternal battle between developers and project managers continues! This meme perfectly captures the skepticism devs feel when a PM claims they're making life easier. In theory, PMs should shield developers from distractions and streamline workflows. In practice? They're often the ones introducing new tools, changing requirements mid-sprint, and asking "quick questions" that derail your entire afternoon of deep work. The silent stare in the third panel says everything a developer is thinking but can't say in the Slack channel. It's that universal "sure, Jan" moment that happens right before you get an invite to another "quick sync" that somehow lasts 90 minutes.

How To Catch A Programmer Hiding

How To Catch A Programmer Hiding
The horror movie villain's greatest weakness: corporate IT processes! Even knife-wielding maniacs can't bypass the sacred ticket system. The programmer's terrified face in panel 2 perfectly captures that moment when you realize someone's about to ask you for help via direct message instead of following protocol. And that final panel? Pure developer schadenfreude - watching the villain collapse at the mere mention of "submit a ticket" is basically what happens to any dev's soul when forced to deal with JIRA for the 47th time today. The ultimate developer defense system isn't a firewall - it's bureaucracy.

Real Struggle

Real Struggle
The multi-monitor dependency is REAL . Once you've experienced the sweet digital real estate of three screens, your productivity gets absolutely wrecked when forced back to laptop life. It's like trying to code through a keyhole. Your workflow becomes a crawl, your IDE tabs multiply like rabbits, and Alt+Tab becomes your most abused keyboard shortcut. The stretcher scene is basically your productivity being carried away on life support. Trust me, I've been there - frantically searching for HDMI adapters in hotel rooms like some kind of display junkie.

Worth It

Worth It
The galaxy brain moment when you convince yourself that spending 48 hours automating a task that takes 20 minutes is somehow "efficient." But let's be real—we're not doing it to save time. We're doing it because manually repeating the same task feels like psychological torture, and writing that script gives us the same dopamine hit as solving a puzzle. Sure, we'll never recoup those hours, but our fragile programmer ego can't handle the thought of doing something "the easy way." It's not laziness, it's... "future-proofing."

I Want My Full History In

I Want My Full History In
The bell curve of git commit sanity. On the left, the blissfully ignorant junior dev who squashes multiple feature changes into a single commit. On the right, the battle-hardened senior who does the same because life's too short. And in the middle? The poor mid-level developer meticulously separating each feature into its own commit, following best practices that nobody actually reads in the git log. The sweet irony of development—you either die a hero or live long enough to stop caring about commit granularity.

Am Ithe Only One

Am Ithe Only One
The eternal tragedy of email attachments! You spend 30 minutes crafting the perfect professional email, triple-checking grammar and tone... only to hit send and watch your carefully attached files get left behind like abandoned passengers on the runway. The plane takes off (email sent) while your important documents stand there helplessly on the boarding stairs wondering what they did to deserve this betrayal. The number of times I've had to send that shameful follow-up "Sorry, HERE'S the attachment I mentioned" is my personal developer walk of shame.