sysadmin Memes

The Ultimate Firewall Activation Method

5 hours ago 50.3K views 0 shares

Whoever labeled this network cable with "Cut here to activate firewall" is the chaotic evil genius we all secretly aspire to be. Nothing says "I've been in IT long enough to develop a twisted sense of humor" quite like setting up your colleagues for catastrophic network failure. The best part? Some poor soul will eventually believe it. Ten years in networking and I've seen people reboot production servers because someone told them it would "make the internet faster." Trust no one, especially the guy who labels cables.

Microsoft Licensing: Where Logic Goes To Die

Microsoft Devops Windows Cloud

12 hours ago 102.0K views 0 shares

Microsoft Licensing: Where Logic Goes To Die

The eternal Microsoft licensing labyrinth claims another victim! Anyone who's survived a Microsoft audit knows this pain - trying to decipher their deliberately cryptic licensing rules is like trying to solve a Rubik's cube blindfolded while someone keeps changing the colors. After days of reading contradictory forum posts, conflicting official docs, and getting different answers from every MS rep, this admin finally reached enlightenment: "Screw it, I'm doing it my way." The beautiful simplicity of "one server, one license, two VMs" is the IT equivalent of finding inner peace. The best part? That defiant "Here are my 4 licenses for 4 servers with 8 VMs" stance. It's the sysadmin equivalent of telling the IRS "here's my math, fight me."

Thoughts On A Physical Firewall To Prevent Tailgating?

Security Networking

17 hours ago 121.0K views 0 shares

Thoughts On A Physical Firewall To Prevent Tailgating?

When the network security team takes "firewall" a bit too literally! This is what happens when you ask the new intern to implement a solution for tailgating (when unauthorized people follow authorized personnel through security doors). Instead of a policy solution, they've deployed a wall of actual fire to prevent physical intrusion. Talk about extreme perimeter security! The sysadmin probably said "make sure nobody gets through" and well... mission accomplished. Zero false negatives with this implementation.

The Forbidden Connection

Security Networking Hardware Windows

1 day ago 123.4K views 0 shares

That laptop has seen things. Dark, unspeakable things. The kind of security vulnerabilities that make sysadmins wake up in cold sweats at 3 AM. It's either running Windows XP in a nuclear facility, storing the only copy of production credentials, or it's that one machine that somehow still runs the company's legacy COBOL app from 1983 that nobody understands but everyone depends on. The skull and crossbones is basically saying "this machine is one npm install away from causing an international incident." Respect the warning, people.

Best Rack Cabinet I've Ever Seen

Networking Devops Hardware Linux

1 day ago 130.7K views 0 shares

When the network admin says "we don't have budget for proper infrastructure" but you've got a microwave from 1992 and a dream. The classic "it's not stupid if it works" approach to networking. That router is getting the five-star treatment with its own Faraday cage that doubles as a popcorn maker. Bet the WiFi password is "HotPocket123" and the network goes down every time someone heats up lunch. Enterprise-grade cooling? Nah, just leave the door open. I've seen cleaner cable management in a pasta bowl, but hey—zero dollars spent on a rack cabinet, infinite points for creativity.

When The IT Team Is Just You...

Microsoft Networking Security Windows

2 days ago 71.3K views 0 shares

Ah, the classic "one person wearing all the hats" syndrome. This is what happens when management says "we're streamlining IT operations" but really means "we fired everyone except you." The Squidward multiverse perfectly captures that moment when you're simultaneously fixing Karen's printer, fending off ransomware, resetting the CEO's password for the 17th time this month, and trying to figure out why Microsoft decided to move everything in the admin center again . Pro tip: When asked how long something will take, multiply your estimate by 5 and add "depending on how many password resets interrupt me." Works every time.

The Linux Update Addiction Spectrum

Linux Devops Bash Programming

7 days ago 145.8K views 0 shares

The eternal battle between Linux update strategies, beautifully illustrated by someone who's clearly spent too much time staring at a terminal. Top panel: "Here's how to keep Linux updated for normal humans" - followed by a list of options that would make any sane person question their life choices. Manual updates that will eventually kill your system? Hard pass. Bottom panel: The character suddenly perks up at options that would make any system administrator weep tears of joy. Immutable systems with automatic updates? Rolling releases with daily snapshots? It's the perfect encapsulation of how Linux users gradually transform from "I just want my computer to work" to "I need my system to update itself 47 times daily while maintaining perfect atomic snapshots with zero downtime." The addiction is real.

Is It Still Safe To Use Windows 7?

Windows Security Microsoft

8 days ago 234.7K views 0 shares

The ultimate security through obscurity! Someone installed Windows on what appears to be a giant architectural display screen. That tiny Windows logo boot screen is like hanging a "HACK ME" sign on Fort Knox. Running outdated OS on building-sized hardware is next-level commitment to legacy systems. The IT department must've missed the memo about end-of-life support... by about a decade. Somewhere, a sysadmin is frantically trying to explain why their building BSOD'd during a client presentation.

Just Pull The Yellow Cable, They Said

Networking Devops Hardware Programming

8 days ago 273.8K views 0 shares

When your senior dev casually says "just pull the yellow cable" and you walk into the server room to find THIS . It's like trying to find a specific needle in a stack of identical needles. The networking equivalent of "it's in the documentation" when the docs are 5,000 pages long. This is what happens when cable management has a mental breakdown. The person who labeled these is probably the same one who writes variable names like temp1 , temp2 , anotherTemp .

What Is A Data Backup Worth?

Databases Security Devops Programming

11 days ago 121.1K views 0 shares

The value of backups follows the classic IT tragedy in three acts: Act I: "What's a backup worth?" you ask, staring at your perfectly functional system. Act II: "Nothing," you decide, because everything's working fine and storage costs money. Act III: After your production database spontaneously combusts at 4:30pm on a Friday before a holiday weekend, suddenly that backup is worth your entire career, marriage, and will to live. Funny how perspective changes when you're staring at the digital equivalent of a burning city.

Early Access To Kernel Panic

Linux Programming

11 days ago 198.2K views 2 shares

Starting them young on kernel compilation, I see. That baby's face is the exact same expression I had during my first segmentation fault. Dad's over here thinking he's preparing the next Linus Torvalds, but that kid's already contemplating a career in product management. Nothing says "I love you" like condemning your offspring to a lifetime of tracking down missing dependencies and explaining to non-technical family members that "No, I can't fix your printer just because I know Linux."

Stop Doing ASCII Filenames: The Unicode Rebellion

Programming Security Devops Bash Windows

14 days ago 186.6K views 0 shares

Stop Doing ASCII Filenames: The Unicode Rebellion

The filesystem rebellion we never asked for! Unicode and special characters in filenames are the chaotic evil of computing. Remember those ancient days when filenames had to be 8.3 format and couldn't have spaces? Fast forward to now where someone's saving files as $6.14 receipt for bagel @ Bagel Bitc# 😋.pdf.jpg and filesystem engineers are quietly sobbing in the corner. The best part is that "CAPITAL I LOWERCASE L NUMBER 1" joke - because nothing says "I want to watch the world burn" like creating filenames specifically designed to be visually indistinguishable from each other. It's like the digital equivalent of replacing someone's sugar with salt. And that absurdly specific filepath to Abbey Road? Pure psychological warfare against sysadmins everywhere.

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