Bad practices Memes

Security Experts Hate This One Simple Trick

2 days ago 136.5K views 0 shares

Security Experts Hate This One Simple Trick

Security experts: "Use complex passwords, rotate them regularly, never store them in plaintext." Meanwhile, some server admin with their passwords.txt file accessible via direct URL, using "admin" as both username and password: "I'm something of a security expert myself." The tabs open in the background (phpMyAdmin, Cloud Shell, etc.) really complete the masterpiece of digital negligence. Chef's kiss to whoever set up this security nightmare.

Is This Justified

C++ Networking Security Programming Debugging

4 days ago 143.9K views 0 shares

Ah, the classic "just reset everything and pray" approach to buffer overflow. Nothing says "enterprise-ready" like a class that admits it's not thread-safe in a TODO comment that's probably been there since 2007. The cherry on top is that C-style cast with the helpful "WARNING" comment right next to it. Because nothing makes me sleep better at night than knowing our production system handles network packets by just yeeting the buffer offset back to zero when things get spicy. This code is basically the digital equivalent of duct-taping a leaking pipe while the house is flooding. And the name "LegacyConnectionManager" is the perfect touch - we all know "Legacy" is code for "nobody wants to touch this nightmare but we can't afford to rewrite it."

Tempting, Isn't It?

Programming StackOverflow Debugging Testing

5 days ago 124.1K views 0 shares

That moment when your deadline is tomorrow and the proper solution would take 5 hours, but that sketchy Stack Overflow answer with zero comments could fix it in 5 minutes. The eternal battle between doing it right and just making it work. We all know which one wins when the project manager is breathing down your neck. Who needs documentation when you have caffeine and blind optimism? Future you can deal with the technical debt... right?

It Does Raise An Exception

Programming Python Debugging Testing

5 days ago 116.2K views 0 shares

The evolution of error handling, as told by Pooh: First panel: Regular Pooh with raise Exception("An error occured.") - the coding equivalent of saying "something broke" and walking away. Second panel: Fancy Pooh with raise ValueError("Invalid use...") - now we're being specific, like wearing a tuxedo to tell someone they screwed up. Third panel: Demonic Pooh with 1/0 - the chaotic evil approach. Why throw an exception when you can just divide by zero and watch the world burn? Pure malevolence disguised as code. The kind of thing that makes senior devs wake up in cold sweats.

Stuff Of Nightmares

Devops Git Programming Debugging Testing

8 days ago 140.8K views 0 shares

Regular ghosts? Pfft, not scary. But pushing untested code to production on Friday afternoon? PURE TERROR. Nothing says "I've chosen violence today" quite like deploying right before the weekend. The developer's screaming face perfectly captures that moment when you realize your weekend plans just transformed into "debugging mysterious errors while your PM sends increasingly concerned texts." Pro tip: the only thing that should get pushed on Friday is your office chair... back under your desk as you leave at 2pm.

The Art Of Problem Avoidance

Debugging Webdev Devops Programming Testing

8 days ago 111.0K views 0 shares

Ah, the sophisticated art of problem-solving! Why spend hours debugging your broken code when you can simply delete the linter and live in blissful ignorance? It's like covering the check engine light with duct tape instead of fixing your car. Sure, the code still crashes in production, but at least those pesky red squiggly lines aren't hurting your feelings anymore. Modern problems require modern solutions—just not particularly good ones.

Working Is Working

Programming Agile Debugging Testing

8 days ago 169.6K views 0 shares

The eternal developer mantra: "If it compiles, ship it!" Sure, your colleagues might be horrified by your spaghetti code that looks like it was written during a caffeine-induced hallucination at 3 AM, but hey—the end user doesn't see your variable named "thisStupidThing" or your 200-line function with 17 nested if statements. The compiler doesn't judge your life choices, and neither should your coworkers. Just remember to document it with "// Don't touch this code, it works by black magic" and suddenly you're not a bad programmer—you're a code wizard!

The CSV Delimiter Paradox

Programming Debugging Testing Databases

9 days ago 142.7K views 0 shares

Fighting imposter syndrome? Take comfort in knowing that somewhere out there, a "professional" developer is using commas as both the delimiter AND the data in their CSV files. That's like using a door as both the entrance AND the wall. Pure chaos. The parser screams in binary. Data integrity weeps silently in the corner. And yet, they're still employed with "years of experience." Sleep well tonight knowing your bar-to-clear is literally on the ground.

If A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words, An Emoji Is Worth A Database Column

Databases Programming Debugging

13 days ago 237.4K views 0 shares

If A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words, An Emoji Is Worth A Database Column

When your database administrator is too lazy to type actual column names but has an emoji keyboard shortcut ready to go. This PostgreSQL session is peak chaotic evil energy – creating tables and domains with emojis instead of sensible names. Somewhere, a junior dev is staring at this schema wondering how to write a query joining the 📦 table where 🔴 = 'production_status' without copy-pasting emojis from Slack. Meanwhile, the DBA is probably sipping coffee and thinking "documentation is for the weak." Future maintainers will either quit on the spot or develop a twisted admiration for this absolute madlad who decided conventional naming conventions were just too mainstream.

Goto: The Fast Track To Getting Fired

C++ Programming Debugging

14 days ago 126.8K views 0 shares

The top code uses proper control flow with nested if statements and while loops - structured, readable, and maintainable. The bottom code? Pure chaos with line numbers and goto statements jumping around like a caffeinated squirrel. Nothing says "I want my colleagues to suffer" quite like spraying goto statements throughout your code. It's like leaving landmines for the next developer who has to maintain your mess. The best part? Both programs return 69 - because even terrible code can sometimes get the job done. Pro tip: If you want job security, write code only you can understand. If you want respect, never use goto .

Security Nightmare Disguised As Optimization

Databases Security Programming

14 days ago 120.4K views 0 shares

Security Nightmare Disguised As Optimization

Ah yes, the classic "let's sacrifice security on the altar of optimization." This database hero just casually suggested storing all passwords in a single table with foreign keys because "users reuse passwords anyway" – reducing storage from 100GB to 3GB. What a brilliant idea! Next up: storing all user data in a public GitHub repo to save on AWS costs. Security experts aren't having panic attacks right now, they're just doing synchronized fainting as an office team-building exercise.

License To Deploy

Programming Devops Debugging Testing

18 days ago 154.7K views 0 shares

The secret agent of technical debt! Just like James Bond leaves a trail of explosions behind him, this developer leaves a trail of production bugs. No comments, no documentation, and 7 critical issues that somehow made it past QA. The name's Code... Bad Code. Licensed to deploy straight to production without peer review.

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