Bad practices Memes

Stop Over Engineering (And Start Over Exploiting)

2 days ago 88.1K views 0 shares

Stop Over Engineering (And Start Over Exploiting)

Nothing says "I trust my users completely" like letting them run raw SQL queries directly against your production database. This code is basically saying "Here's the keys to my database kingdom, please don't DELETE FROM users WHERE 1=1." It's the digital equivalent of leaving your front door wide open with a sign that says "Please don't steal anything." Security teams everywhere just felt a disturbance in the force, as if millions of injection vulnerabilities suddenly cried out in terror.

I Love Optimization (That Makes Security Experts Cry)

Databases Security Programming Backend

4 days ago 95.7K views 0 shares

I Love Optimization (That Makes Security Experts Cry)

Ah, the "optimization" that makes security professionals wake up screaming! This tweet is showcasing the database equivalent of putting all your eggs in one extremely flammable basket. Sure, they reduced storage from 100GB to 3GB by centralizing all passwords with foreign key references. But they've also created the ultimate security nightmare - one breach and all passwords are compromised. Not to mention they're enabling password reuse, which is like using "password123" as your bank PIN, email password, and nuclear launch code. That 97GB reduction is going to cost them approximately $10 million in breach notification costs. Such efficiency!

Same Bugs New Repo

Programming Git Debugging Testing

8 days ago 170.9K views 0 shares

Ah, the classic "fresh start" delusion. Developer sees their old project infested with bugs (those cute green gremlins), and thinks starting a new project will somehow magically solve everything. Then proceeds to literally copy-paste chunks of the old code—bugs and all—into the new project. The box even says "THIS SIDE UP" upside down because reading documentation was never our strong suit. Ten years of experience has taught me that no matter how clean the new repo looks, those bugs are just waiting for their chance to emerge... usually right before a demo to the client.

How To Ruin Your Weekend

Devops Git Kubernetes Docker Programming

9 days ago 104.2K views 0 shares

The AUDACITY of that finger hovering over the deploy button on a Friday! 💀 Nothing says "I hate myself and everyone around me" quite like pushing code right before the weekend. That finger is literally ONE PRESS away from turning your peaceful Saturday morning into a hellscape of emergency Slack notifications and your boss calling you while you're trying to enjoy your cereal. The weekend-ruining potential is just *chef's kiss* magnificent. It's like setting your future self on fire for the mild convenience of not waiting until Monday!

The Unpaid Intern's Parting Gift

Security Devops Git Programming Cloud

11 days ago 192.5K views 0 shares

Ah, the classic revenge of the unpaid intern! When your company thinks exposure is a valid form of payment, but you're leaving with something far more valuable—their API key. Nothing says "thanks for the experience" quite like committing sensitive credentials to a public repository on your way out. It's the digital equivalent of taking the office stapler, except this one could cost them thousands in unauthorized AWS charges. Remember kids: proper credential management isn't just good practice, it's also why you should probably pay your developers.

Just Ignore And Try Again Later ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Debugging Programming Testing Backend

13 days ago 153.6K views 0 shares

$Just Ignore And Try Again Later ¯\_(ツ)_/¯$

The code equivalent of sweeping dust under the rug! That comment in the catch block is basically every developer at 4:59 PM on a Friday. "Oh, an exception? I'll just leave a cute little shrug emoticon and a comment promising to fix it 'later' (read: never). Because who needs proper error handling when you can just pretend the problem doesn't exist? Future You will totally appreciate this brilliant strategy when production crashes at 2 AM!

OAuth Done Right

Security Webdev Javascript Programming Frontend

15 days ago 163.2K views 0 shares

When you ask a junior dev to implement OAuth and they take "social login" to a whole new dimension. Normal OAuth providers? Boring! Let's authenticate with a potato, your mom, and Beef Caldereta instead! Nothing says "secure authentication flow" like logging in with a PDF or your physical address. The cherry on top is "Login with Caution" - the only button that's actually giving sound security advice here.

What Not To Do

Debugging Devops Programming Testing

19 days ago 142.5K views 0 shares

Ah, the sacred art of "it works, don't touch it." That smug face perfectly captures the chaotic neutral energy of someone who just fixed a critical bug with a random semicolon and has absolutely no intention of explaining why. Future you will absolutely love trying to debug that mysterious fix six months later when everything breaks again. Nothing says "professional software engineering" quite like leaving cryptic time bombs in your codebase and slinking away with a thumbs up. This is basically the digital equivalent of fixing your car by kicking it in just the right spot and then refusing to tell the mechanic what you did.

When Your Private Key Is Public

Security Networking Programming

24 days ago 175.3K views 0 shares

When your private key is just a Lady Gaga tweet from 2012. Somewhere a security engineer is having a heart attack right now. Nothing says "military-grade encryption" like random characters from a pop star's keyboard smash that's been publicly available for over a decade. Next up in cybersecurity innovations: using your cat's walking pattern across your keyboard as your password hash.

Hear Me Out: The Variable Declarations Need A Try-Catch

Programming Javascript Java Debugging

26 days ago 169.8K views 0 shares

Hear Me Out: The Variable Declarations Need A Try-Catch

DARLING, SWEETIE, HONEY CHILD! 💅 You haven't lived until you've inherited code where some ABSOLUTE PSYCHOPATH decided that variable declarations should be wrapped in try-catch blocks! Like, what kind of trauma led to this?! Are they expecting the variable to PHYSICALLY ASSAULT them during initialization?! "Oh no, my string might throw an exception when I declare it!" PLEASE! This is the coding equivalent of wearing a helmet to eat soup! I CAN'T EVEN! 🙄

Just Keep Coding, We'll Fix It Later

Programming Devops Agile Debugging Testing

1 month ago 182.8K views 0 shares

Construction workers building a completely misaligned brick wall is basically the software development lifecycle in one image. "Just keep coding. We can always fix it later" is the mantra that turns 2-week sprints into 6-month refactoring nightmares. The technical debt pictured here would make even the most optimistic project manager cry. But hey, at least it compiles.

What's Stopping You From Coding Like This

Security Webdev Programming Debugging

1 month ago 149.7K views 0 shares

What's Stopping You From Coding Like This

My API keys are now getting more sunshine than I am. Nothing says "senior developer energy" like casually exposing your entire security infrastructure to the local wildlife while pretending you're achieving work-life balance. Those red lines aren't just API keys—they're a speedrun to unemployment. Pro tip: If you're going to commit career suicide, at least do it with a better view than your neighbor's flag.

Browse