ATTENTION PROGRAMMERS: Be sure to check your kid's candy carefully after Halloween. There can be recursions inside!

Content IGN People settle for a level of despair they can tolerate and call it happiness. - Soren Kierkegaard, on the most recent JavaScript framework Froarammerhumor.ic

Content Recruiter I have a job offer for you Recruiter Me, a frontend dev with no backend experience For frontend, right? Me, a frontend dev with no backend experience For frontend, right?

Content ?php header ("Content-type: texthtml; charsetutf-8"); This is a warning to any poor soul who may have to deal with this code. I took over this criminal piece of chaos from a monkey named Joel who I assume had been given a typewriter by Mephistopheles himself. For reasons I have yet been unable to fathom, he decided to patch together this thing using a BaseX setup hardwired into an unfixably broken Manjaro VM, queried by a handwritten plate of uncommented PHP spaghetti fit to feed an army of people with a serious death wish, without any framework or CMS. The very long BaseX script, very long PH presenter and very long XSLT stylesheet mostly perform the same heuristic document structuring for different components and are supposed to produce compatible results, but I bet they have mismatches somewhere. Since Prof. T just wanted a few small functional enhancements, I decided to just patch it and keep the general setup. Unless you were hired to correct some spelling mistakes, DO NOT FOLLOW IN MY STEPS. Putting up with this simulation of how a goldfish would design a system has literally given me CLINICAL DEPRESSION. This is not an exaggeration, I am writing this after a prolonged medical therapy - mostly successful, thanks for asking, but not fun. I wouldn't wish this code on anybody who isn't a manager at Oracle or Facebook, and therefore give you this sincere advice: Nuke this. Take the XSLT if you must, and then nuke the app and recreate it in Django or whatever works for you. I would do it myself, but I risked a relapse simply by opening this file again to write this comment. Dear brother or sister, I wish you all the luck and strength in the world and hope it will be enough. Farewell. error reporting(E ALL); ini set ("displayerrors", true); printi'7xml version"1.0" encoding "UTF-8" 7'. "In"):?

The most tragic love story in programming: someone asking "Do you still love me?" and getting a response with a syntax error. That semicolon before "yes" is basically saying "I'm breaking up with you in JavaScript." The compiler caught the red flag before she did. Next time just ghost her like a proper undefined variable.

Content Rod Hilton rodhiltonmastodon.social BERICHTEN MET REACTIES VASTGEZET M Rod Hilton rodhiltonmastodon.so..3d He talked about electric cars. I don't know anything about cars, so when people said he was a genius I figured he must be a genius. Then he talked about rockets. I don't know anything about rockets, so when people said he was a genius I figured he must be a genius. Now he talks about software. I happen to know a lot about software Elon Musk is saying the stupidest shit I've ever heard anyone say, so when people say he's a genius I figure I should stay the hell away from his cars and rockets. ProdrammerHumor.io

The cosmic weight scale has a new champion! While astronomers worry about black holes and neutron stars, developers know the true gravitational monsters: Python virtual environments, Node modules, and PyTorch/CUDA installations. Nothing collapses spacetime quite like waiting for npm install to finish or watching your disk space vanish as PyTorch downloads half the internet. At least black holes have the decency to be millions of light years away—your Python venv is right there, crushing your hard drive and your spirits simultaneously.