You Want Broken Code? Ok No Problem

The rarest creature in software development: a programmer who actually fixes bugs within the timeframe they promised. Sure, they'll confidently declare "I'll fix it in an hour" with the same conviction as someone who says "just one more episode before bed." Two hours later, they're down a rabbit hole of Stack Overflow tabs, questioning their career choices and the fundamental laws of computer science. The real joke is that we keep believing them every single time.

Content robin dreamsofsloth 1d the first thing our new hire did was fix a bug that's been bugging him forever as a user prior to joining. he then breathed a sigh of relief and submitted his two weeks' notice. wtf?? 67 17 822 4373 Show this thread

Content You don't have to debug your code if you never write your program.

Someone decided their CPU needed the prehistoric cooling method. Instead of applying thermal paste like a normal human being with a pea-sized dot or spread, they've literally placed a tiny Loch Ness Monster figurine on the processor. The thermal conductivity of plastic mythical creatures is approximately... terrible. That chip is about to reach temperatures hotter than my rage when management asks for "just one more feature" right before deployment. At least when this CPU inevitably catches fire, they can blame it on not having tree fiddy for proper cooling solution.

Ah, the magical world of "vibe coding" - where efficiency means creating catastrophic inefficiency at unprecedented speed! Two engineers casually generating enough technical debt to keep 50 engineers employed for the next decade. It's like watching arsonists brag about how quickly they can burn down a forest. "Look at us being so productive with our unreadable one-liners and zero documentation!" Meanwhile, future developers are already updating their résumés because they sense a disturbance in the codebase. Remember kids, technical debt is like regular debt except your bank is the grim reaper of software projects, and he always collects with interest.

The JavaScript pushState() function has an unused parameter that literally does nothing but can't be removed because... backward compatibility! 🤦‍♂️ It's like that one useless function parameter that's been in your codebase for 5 years and everyone's too scared to remove it because "something might break." The documentation even admits it with a straight face: "This parameter exists for historical reasons, and cannot be omitted." The red scribbles perfectly capture every developer's reaction: "??? WTF" - which is basically the official technical term for legacy code maintenance.