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The four stages of revisiting your old code: shock, disbelief, existential crisis, and finally the crushing realization that past-you was a complete psychopath. First it's "Why would anyone write this abomination?" Then slowly the horrifying truth dawns on you - you are the monster who created this nightmare of nested if-statements and variables named 'temp1', 'temp2', and the classic 'finalFinalREALFINAL'. The worst part? That moment when you finally understand your own twisted logic and think "Oh, that's actually kind of clever" - right before realizing you now have to maintain this clever monstrosity for another year.

Content No Code No code is the best way to write secure and reliable applications. Write nothing; deploy nowhere. Getting Started Start by not writing any code. This is just an example application, but imagine it doing anything you want. Adding new features is easy too: The possibilities are endless.

THE AUDACITY! This poor soul thought they were escaping the legal labyrinth only to land in the coding HELLSCAPE of Stack Overflow arguments, conflicting documentation, and StackOverflow answers from 2011 that somehow still work but nobody knows why! 💀 Traded one nightmare for another - avoiding legal jargon just to spend eternity debating whether tabs or spaces are superior while three different package managers fight to the death on your hard drive. The cosmic joke of career choices!

The classic "have you tried turning it off and on again" tech support trick dates back to the Jurassic period of computing! When a developer loses their cursor in 1983, they immediately resort to the oldest trick in the book—faking a hardware problem and suggesting a reboot. The best part? It actually works, and the comic perfectly captures that smug satisfaction when your BS technical explanation saves the day. Some programmer traditions never die, they just get faster processors.

The classic "it's not you, it's me" breakup line gets a multithreaded makeover! Our poor developer thought throwing mutexes and closing channels would fix their relationship problems, but they missed the fundamental truth of concurrent programming: no amount of locks can protect you from emotional deadlocks. Meanwhile, their partner is contemplating switching to the "Hawk TUAH" - which is either some obscure programming framework or proof that even in bed, developers are thinking about optimizing performance. Spoiler alert: neither mutexes nor Hawk TUAH will save this relationship from its fatal exception.

Content When it's your wedding but you've got a production bug to fix real quick towernter