The Mythical Production-Only Bug

The classic tech hype cycle in its natural habitat. First, AI writes 90% of code. Then AI writes 100% of code. Then reality hits and humans get paid premium wages to fix the AI's spaghetti code. Reminds me of that time we deployed an "automated" monitoring system that generated so many false alerts we had to hire three people just to monitor the monitoring system. Progress!

Opera GX: "We've added the fried egg back to program files due to popular demand." Also Opera GX: "We saved 18kb by removing this fried egg image that's been sitting in our codebase since 2019." Nothing says "professional software development" quite like embedding random food pictures in your browser. Somewhere, a developer spent actual work hours arguing about egg retention in a code review. And people wonder why software updates take so long.

The gradual transformation into a clown perfectly captures the self-delusion cycle every developer goes through when skipping comments. First, you're confident. Then, slightly doubtful. By the third stage, you're in full circus mode, realizing future-you will have absolutely no idea what that cryptic one-liner does. The final form? Complete clown status when you're debugging your own uncommented code at 2AM six months later, wondering which genius wrote this incomprehensible masterpiece. Spoiler alert: it was you.

So you're feeling adventurous, installing Linux for the first time, everything's going smooth. Then you hit a snag and ask your favorite AI chatbot for help. It confidently spits out some commands, and you—being the trusting soul you are—copy-paste them straight into the CLI without reading. Plot twist: the AI gave you commands for a completely different file system. You just shoved RTFM (Read The Freaking Manual) instructions into a CLI that expected something else entirely. Now your system is toast, Linux won't boot, and you're lying face-down on the pavement wondering where it all went wrong. The moral? AI is like that friend who sounds confident but doesn't actually know what they're talking about. Always skim what you're running, or you'll be reinstalling your OS at 2 AM while questioning your life choices. Fun fact: RTFM exists for a reason, and that reason is preventing exactly this kind of disaster.

This isn't just a bingo card—it's a developer's nightmare scorecard. Got all 16 squares? Congratulations, you've unlocked the achievement "Stockholm Syndrome: Corporate Edition!" My personal favorite is "QA not needed: just write code without bugs" — right up there with "just cure cancer" and "just solve world hunger." The "call to discuss calls" square perfectly captures that special circle of hell where we spend our lives in meetings about future meetings. And don't forget the classic "It's a simple task. Are you having difficulty?" translation: "I have absolutely no idea what this involves but I'm going to make it sound like you're incompetent anyway." The real winner? "Unpaid overtime" sitting quietly in the corner like it's not the foundation this entire industry is built upon.

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