Based On A True Story

Based On A True Story
algorithm-memes, chess-programming-memes, performance-optimization-memes, minimax-memes, beginner-mistakes-memes | ProgrammerHumor.io

The classic journey from naive optimism to brutal reality. Someone starts Googling "How to program chess" at 8:32 PM, probably thinking "how hard could it be?" Then 11 minutes later—which in programming time is basically a microsecond—they're already hitting the performance wall with "Why is my chess program so slow."

This speedrun from tutorial hell to optimization purgatory is beautiful. They probably implemented a naive minimax algorithm that evaluates every possible move recursively, realized their program takes 47 years to calculate 5 moves ahead, and immediately regretted their life choices. Chess engines are deceptively complex—you need alpha-beta pruning, transposition tables, move ordering, and a bunch of other black magic to make them remotely playable. Stockfish didn't become a 3500 ELO monster by accident.

The "An Eternity later" with only 11 minutes passing is *chef's kiss*. That's the exact moment when someone discovers that chess has approximately 10^120 possible games and their O(n!) algorithm isn't cutting it.

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