Copilot False Hopes

THE AUDACITY! Companies slapping ".ai" on their products while secretly running on the world's most reliable resource: underpaid offshore developers! The meme SAVAGELY calls out Amazon Go and Builder.ai with that devastatingly precise punchline - "If I had a nickel for every 'AI' product that was actually just underpaid Indians, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice." I'm SCREAMING! It's the tech industry's worst-kept secret wrapped in a Phineas and Ferb reference! The AI washing is so transparent you could use it as a window cleaner! 💀

The AI ethics bot just witnessed a child.kill() function and had a full-blown existential crisis. Classic case of "context matters" in programming. The bot's like "I can't assist with violence!" while the code's just handling thread management. Look at that beautiful irony - a recursively named AI refusing to help with perfectly innocent code because it contains a murder-sounding method. Six years of code reviews and I've never seen an AI clutch its digital pearls this hard.

Ah yes, the existential crisis of every Python developer. Born in 1991, older than Java (1995), yet somehow still the awkward middle child of programming languages. The counter showing "0 days without suicidal thoughts" is just *chef's kiss* perfect. Meanwhile, Java's out there running banking systems and Android, while Python's still trying to convince everyone that "no really, we're enterprise-ready too!" despite spending most of its time doing data science homework and gluing together other people's actual technologies. The bearded dev staring into the void with coffee is all of us who chose Python for its "simplicity" only to realize we picked the language equivalent of a participation trophy.

The eternal VC funding dance. Top panel shows startup founders desperately holding up an "AI" label when asked what powers their startup. Bottom panel reveals the truth: it's just "Algorithms" – you know, the thing programmers have been using since computers existed. Nothing says "add three zeros to your valuation" quite like slapping "AI" on your if-else statements. Venture capitalists can't throw money fast enough when they hear those two magical letters.

Everyone's terrified of superintelligent AI destroying humanity, meanwhile actual AI is just slapping "-uary" onto every month like a sleep-deprived intern. "Maruary" and "Apruary" sound like months from a parallel universe where calendars were designed by a five-year-old. The real existential threat isn't Skynet—it's spreadsheets with months that sound like they were named after drinking too much eggnog. If this is the AI revolution, we can probably hold off on building those bunkers.

Turns out the most advanced AI was just 700 people in a trenchcoat. Builder.ai allegedly sold "AI" that was actually just outsourced developers pretending to be Natasha the chatbot. The classic "artificial" intelligence that's actually just regular intelligence with extra steps. Next revelation: ChatGPT is just a guy named Greg in a basement with really fast typing skills.