Make Webdev Great Again

The duality of a programmer's existence captured perfectly! At work, you're dragging yourself through another CRUD app with the enthusiasm of a sloth on sedatives. But start a side project? Suddenly you're coding at 3 AM with the intensity of someone possessed, creating an elaborate algorithm to optimize your cat's feeding schedule—which you'll abandon halfway through because you had a new idea for a command-line tool that generates haikus about garbage collection. The cemetery of unfinished GitHub repos grows larger every weekend.

The eternal debate rages on! A museum-worthy collection of countless programming languages displayed as intricate bugs... and then there's HTML, represented by five sad beetles in a separate case. The programming equivalent of bringing a spoon to a knife fight. Sure, HTML structures your web pages, but calling it a programming language is like calling a grocery list a novel. The real developers are upstairs writing actual code while HTML is just sitting there going "Look mom, I made a <div>!"

The modern browser innovation pipeline in a nutshell! Why reinvent the wheel when you can just repaint it? Every "new" browser these days is essentially Chromium with a fresh coat of paint and marketing buzzwords. Brave, Edge, Opera—they're all just Chrome wearing different Halloween costumes. The Chromium monoculture is basically the JavaScript framework situation but for browsers: everyone forking the same codebase while pretending they've created something revolutionary. "Look ma, we added a built-in VPN that slows everything down by 30%!" Meanwhile, Mozilla Firefox sits in the corner, the last bastion of browser engine diversity, wondering where it all went wrong.

The only thing stopping me from coding at 30,000 feet is my fear of someone seeing my spaghetti code with 17 nested if-statements and variable names like temp_fix_pls_delete and idk_why_this_works . Nothing says "professional developer" like frantically Googling basic syntax while the person next to you judges your life choices. The real turbulence isn't outside the plane—it's in my codebase.

Backend developers drawing their own crude solutions with a pen, while frontend devs ride in on majestic white horses looking like wizards from fantasy epics. The irony? Backend code powers everything but looks like it was scribbled by a toddler, while frontend is just there to make users go "ooooh pretty buttons" while secretly being held together with duct tape and Stack Overflow answers. Let's be honest though—both sides think the other has it easy. Meanwhile, full-stack developers are just over here trying to be both at once, probably looking like Gandalf riding a horse with a crayon in hand.

That moment when your teapot is missing half its spout but you still try to pour tea with it anyway. Just like trying to follow that React tutorial from 2022 that casually omits the fact that half the API was deprecated last month. "Just import createClass—oh wait, that's gone. Um, just use componentWillMount—nope, that's gone too." The modern dev experience is basically pouring molten chocolate through a broken teapot and hoping your cup catches more than your countertop.